Anonymous wrote:Your problem is with your husband.

Absolutely. You both need to be on the same page in order for him to get the guts to say no to her. If your husband is aware of the hardships and ignores them, what are the consequences? It sounds like he doesn't agree with your reasons.

Anonymous wrote:
Would your husband be fine with you acting as buffer (not that I recommend it, but someone has to do it), or does he truly wish for the relationship to be like this?

This is a bad recommendation. The mil is not the wife's problem. This should be handled by her husband.

Your problem is with your husband.

Would your husband be fine with you acting as buffer (not that I recommend it, but someone has to do it), or does he truly wish for the relationship to be like this?

Why can't you call her and tell her you can't afford it?

long story short.. My DH has always been my MIL's golden child.. he can do nothing wrong and she has always spoiled him. Through the years she has made comments, etc towards me that I learned to disregard. Eventually I learned she had some sort of mental condition, so I try to ignore her. But she keeps booking trips and vacations and expects us to be there. We are a family of 5 and these trips require flights. We cannot afford to go, but my husband will never say no.

It's a problem for us, and we really need a counselor who specializes in family dynamics in the DC area. Any recommendations are appreciated.