Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

OP here. I care because it has made me question my decision to let him go.

Be more confident in your choices. You know your son better than the randos you've encountered.

I'm not sure why the details of the trip are really being discussed anyway. Why are you telling all these people that they had "more alone time" than was planned? Why is it their business? At 17 it's barely YOUR business.

OP here and I am not discussing details of his trip - DS is. Just in telling about the various places he and the girlfriend went and what they did, it is evident that they were alone. I agree 100% it is his business, including whether or not he is sexually active, but my question is whether or not we made the right decision in letting him go.

No OP, it sounds like a great decision. He is 17, it's good for him to travel, have fun, and learn new things. It is not anyone else's business what happens with his girlfriend. In fact, when I lived in a small town, most of the kids were so bored in the summer that all they did was drink and have sex.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

OP here. I care because it has made me question my decision to let him go.

Be more confident in your choices. You know your son better than the randos you've encountered.

I'm not sure why the details of the trip are really being discussed anyway. Why are you telling all these people that they had "more alone time" than was planned? Why is it their business? At 17 it's barely YOUR business.

+1.

Time to move on to the hand-wringing business of college applications or the costs of senior proms or something/anything else.

You did great! The people who are questioning you are probably not as good of parents themselves. Resist the urge to explain your decisions to them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

OP here. I care because it has made me question my decision to let him go.

After 17 years of raising him well, surprised at your second-guessing after the fact. Let it go. Move on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

OP here. I care because it has made me question my decision to let him go.

Be more confident in your choices. You know your son better than the randos you've encountered.

I'm not sure why the details of the trip are really being discussed anyway. Why are you telling all these people that they had "more alone time" than was planned? Why is it their business? At 17 it's barely YOUR business.

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

OP here. I care because it has made me question my decision to let him go.

Anonymous wrote:I think you did fine. What a great experience for your son. I assume someone has talked to him about birth control and disease prevention? I mean, he's almost certainly sleeping with her, but if he is being safe and within the confines of a committed relationship, there's not much you can do.

OP here. DH and I believe strongly in no premarital sex. However, we have made sure that all our kids know about safe sex and birth control. I don't know that he is sleeping with her and would never ask him (it is his private life and his decisions - we brought him up as best we could). I was happy that DS got to have the experience of going to Europe and staying with natives of the country. I think it was very educational and eye-opening for a basically small-town boy.

Why do you care what other people think, especially given that you say everything went well?

Your son had an experience that he will remember for the rest of his life. No, you were not wrong in letting him go.

You really can't fuss about "raised eyebrows". Especially after the fact. Just parent.

I think you did fine. What a great experience for your son. I assume someone has talked to him about birth control and disease prevention? I mean, he's almost certainly sleeping with her, but if he is being safe and within the confines of a committed relationship, there's not much you can do.

Nope. Sounds fun.

DS is 17 and a good kid. This summer his girlfriend went to Europe for summer school and to visit relatives. DS was home and took a college course and worked full-time. For the last three weeks of the summer, DS flew over to spend with the girlfriend and her family. It was his first trip to Europe and he paid for the plane ticket himself. He came back, had an amazing time, and all is well... or so I thought...

However, now everyone is raising eyebrows that we allowed DS to go. While it did turn out that they had more alone time than I thought they would, I still think it was a great experience for him. He and the girlfriend are close/serious but still planning to attend colleges on different coasts.

Were we wrong? Yes, it has occurred to us that they may have had sex but that could have happened at home as well.