You haven't heard about the "fucking fours" yet? Sorry to break it to you...

3-4 almost killed me too with my son. He just turned 4 and things have improved over the past few months. But the threes were brutal.

I have found, and my DD is about to turn 5, that the 3-4 months before they turn a new age are TERRIBLE. Sassy, tantrum-y, just generally ugly attitude.

3.5 -4 almost killed me with my son. Maybe you are just starting that phase.

Mom of twins who are about to turn 4. The past 3-4 months with one of them has been absolute hell on wheels. He makes us feel like total failures as parents.

The other one has manageable tantrums etc... but is generally incredibly easy to parent and makes us look like rockstars.

One of the silver linings of twins that with identical treatment they can be so incredibly different - so some of it is clearly just innate personality (rather than awful parenting!)

Glad to hear we're not the only ones. DS is 4 in January and the last 6 months have been rough. Bad behavior escalating a lot. We're trying to be good disciplinarians, but we're struggling. Some days all I feel like I'm doing is correcting my child and that's no fun for anyone.

Anonymous wrote:Almost 4 was a tough time for us. Things didn't magically improve on the 4th birthday, but they did get better.
-Mom of a 4 year old

Agree. Four is still tough, but as children approach the age of 4, they start developing improved ability to manage their impulses, and you should notice a reduction in hitting and tantrums. They become even more independent and take pride in their accomplishments. Overall, I think four is pretty delightful with a few tantrums and meltdowns thrown in. Five is even better, except for the new addition of sass and whining.

Anonymous wrote: It depends on you, a ton. Curve, and nip the bad behavior with consistency and no empty threats.

Nonsense.

I don't know, sometimes. My third, who's this age, has been fine. We're strict disciplinarians, when necessary, and I think that helps. Works for us, at least.

Oh gosh, yes it is hard! My son got worse each years from 2-4. Age 5 was much better. He is 6 now and is finally coming into his own! He is very sensitive, so he can still cry about silly things, but it's better than it was. Hang in there! You're not alone!

Mom with twins that are almost 4 (in 3 months). This stage has nearly killed me and I could have posted your post. Girls are a stellar combo of whiny, defiant, tantrum-y...and of course, there are sweet moments. Everyone tells me 4 is so much better. In solidarity!

It depends on you, a ton. Curve, and nip the bad behavior with consistency and no empty threats.

Almost 4 was a tough time for us. Things didn't magically improve on the 4th birthday, but they did get better.
-Mom of a 4 year old

I think all kids have alternating difficult and lovely phases until around 18 or so.

This too shall pass.

DS will be 4 next month and he has recently become really defiant and difficult. He switched classrooms at preschool this week so I'm trying to figure out if it's the age, switching classrooms or a combination of both. He usually does ok with transition, but he was separated from the majority of his friends and I know that's been hard for him. I know everything's a phase, but this one kind of sucks!