Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:50     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you defended the act and acted like it was nbd, I would feel that your family is not one I want my kid around too much, and would try to distance her.

I don't think you need to apologize profusely. But I think you should just say thanks for bringing it to my attention to diffuse the situation. If she escalates, I think you and she should talk about it in person or distance yourselves from each other.


+1 I would also wonder where your daughter got this information if my daughter is a daily friend of hers.


Were you a 13-year-old in the US? Kids talk. Also, there is the Internet. I had certainly heard about BJs and 69 from other kids by the time I was 13, and that was long before the Internet.

If you don't want your kid to hear about anything from other kids -- well, that won't work, unless you isolate your kid from all other kids.

If you want your kid to get reliable information, make sure that your kid doesn't get their information solely from other kids.


I'm the original quoted PP in this post. I agree that this is no unusual/atypical talk for 13yo. My concern is how acceptable the parent thinks the talk (or the acts) are for this age group.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:42     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you defended the act and acted like it was nbd, I would feel that your family is not one I want my kid around too much, and would try to distance her.

I don't think you need to apologize profusely. But I think you should just say thanks for bringing it to my attention to diffuse the situation. If she escalates, I think you and she should talk about it in person or distance yourselves from each other.


+1 I would also wonder where your daughter got this information if my daughter is a daily friend of hers.


Were you a 13-year-old in the US? Kids talk. Also, there is the Internet. I had certainly heard about BJs and 69 from other kids by the time I was 13, and that was long before the Internet.

If you don't want your kid to hear about anything from other kids -- well, that won't work, unless you isolate your kid from all other kids.

If you want your kid to get reliable information, make sure that your kid doesn't get their information solely from other kids.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:38     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:If you defended the act and acted like it was nbd, I would feel that your family is not one I want my kid around too much, and would try to distance her.

I don't think you need to apologize profusely. But I think you should just say thanks for bringing it to my attention to diffuse the situation. If she escalates, I think you and she should talk about it in person or distance yourselves from each other.


+1 I would also wonder where your daughter got this information if my daughter is a daily friend of hers.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:31     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:

Option B: Quick response: "Hey Bertha, thanks for letting me know. Best, Ruthie."



This. The less said, the better.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:27     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Definitely Option B.

Though I would be inclined to include something like "yes, Jane told me the girls were all sharing." But maybe I'm just eye rolling on your behalf
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:26     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:If you defended the act and acted like it was nbd, I would feel that your family is not one I want my kid around too much, and would try to distance her.

I don't think you need to apologize profusely. But I think you should just say thanks for bringing it to my attention to diffuse the situation. If she escalates, I think you and she should talk about it in person or distance yourselves from each other.
+1
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:25     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:Option B.

Then teach your daughter how to use her filter.
+1
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:24     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 13 yo DD came back from summer camp with new knowledge, apparently. She shared it with her friends. Now, her friends mom emailed us to tell me that DD was talking about inappropriate things. Specifically, BJ's and 69. In my mind, that is age appropriate; it was the age I learned about the concepts. And this is how I learned. And, at 13, I though it was gross. What if he peed? Isn't it dirty? (those where my thoughts).

I have not responded to the email. I am thinking of responding it is the right age to hear about this. There is probably a few years before either kid will be in a situation where this will occur (DD is not allowed one-on-one dates until she is 16, though I might relax it later). FWIW, these kids are going into 8th grade next year. Neither girl has shown significant interest in boys yet.

Does this sound age appropriate? Or am I behind/ahead of the curve?


Option A: Continue to ignore the email.

Option B: Quick response: "Hey Bertha, thanks for letting me know. Best, Ruthie."

Option C: Apologize profusely and overreact so she feels embarrassed for making you feel so embarrassed.


Or, “apologize” and praise the relationship this woman has with her child that her child felt safe in sharing her new knowledge with her. Thank her for bringing this to your attention and tell her you will talk with your DD about sharing this with others.
FWIW - I think it is age-appropriate.

+1 to all of this
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:22     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
The girl told her mother ? That's cray cray. I remember being in 8th grade and being told about 69 I was like people do that mind was blown at 14
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:16     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
If you defended the act and acted like it was nbd, I would feel that your family is not one I want my kid around too much, and would try to distance her.

I don't think you need to apologize profusely. But I think you should just say thanks for bringing it to my attention to diffuse the situation. If she escalates, I think you and she should talk about it in person or distance yourselves from each other.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:14     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:Option B.

Then teach your daughter how to use her filter.

+1
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:11     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Option B.

Then teach your daughter how to use her filter.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:10     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 13 yo DD came back from summer camp with new knowledge, apparently. She shared it with her friends. Now, her friends mom emailed us to tell me that DD was talking about inappropriate things. Specifically, BJ's and 69. In my mind, that is age appropriate; it was the age I learned about the concepts. And this is how I learned. And, at 13, I though it was gross. What if he peed? Isn't it dirty? (those where my thoughts).

I have not responded to the email. I am thinking of responding it is the right age to hear about this. There is probably a few years before either kid will be in a situation where this will occur (DD is not allowed one-on-one dates until she is 16, though I might relax it later). FWIW, these kids are going into 8th grade next year. Neither girl has shown significant interest in boys yet.

Does this sound age appropriate? Or am I behind/ahead of the curve?


Option A: Continue to ignore the email.

Option B: Quick response: "Hey Bertha, thanks for letting me know. Best, Ruthie."

Option C: Apologize profusely and overreact so she feels embarrassed for making you feel so embarrassed.


Or, “apologize” and praise the relationship this woman has with her child that her child felt safe in sharing her new knowledge with her. Thank her for bringing this to your attention and tell her you will talk with your DD about sharing this with others.
FWIW - I think it is age-appropriate.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:07     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
Anonymous wrote:My 13 yo DD came back from summer camp with new knowledge, apparently. She shared it with her friends. Now, her friends mom emailed us to tell me that DD was talking about inappropriate things. Specifically, BJ's and 69. In my mind, that is age appropriate; it was the age I learned about the concepts. And this is how I learned. And, at 13, I though it was gross. What if he peed? Isn't it dirty? (those where my thoughts).

I have not responded to the email. I am thinking of responding it is the right age to hear about this. There is probably a few years before either kid will be in a situation where this will occur (DD is not allowed one-on-one dates until she is 16, though I might relax it later). FWIW, these kids are going into 8th grade next year. Neither girl has shown significant interest in boys yet.

Does this sound age appropriate? Or am I behind/ahead of the curve?


Option A: Continue to ignore the email.

Option B: Quick response: "Hey Bertha, thanks for letting me know. Best, Ruthie."

Option C: Apologize profusely and overreact so she feels embarrassed for making you feel so embarrassed.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2015 09:05     Subject: Do I need to do something or is other mom over reacting?
My 13 yo DD came back from summer camp with new knowledge, apparently. She shared it with her friends. Now, her friends mom emailed us to tell me that DD was talking about inappropriate things. Specifically, BJ's and 69. In my mind, that is age appropriate; it was the age I learned about the concepts. And this is how I learned. And, at 13, I though it was gross. What if he peed? Isn't it dirty? (those where my thoughts).

I have not responded to the email. I am thinking of responding it is the right age to hear about this. There is probably a few years before either kid will be in a situation where this will occur (DD is not allowed one-on-one dates until she is 16, though I might relax it later). FWIW, these kids are going into 8th grade next year. Neither girl has shown significant interest in boys yet.

Does this sound age appropriate? Or am I behind/ahead of the curve?