Anonymous wrote:Haha this had been on my mind all summer since I discovered my college son smokes pot. I hav no experience with it and my husband does, but I was surprised that it didn't phase me that much. As long as he appears to be moving fwd in life things ... School jobs friends responsibility and personal care ... Then I'm thinking I'm really ok with it. If I see those benchmarks start to fall then I'm gonna get concerned that there's too much or maybe moved onto something else. He's not a big drinker so I'm not really worried about that.

Is he living in a place where pot is legal? If not, you're kind of overlooking one of the biggest risks inherent in using it.

Haha this had been on my mind all summer since I discovered my college son smokes pot. I hav no experience with it and my husband does, but I was surprised that it didn't phase me that much. As long as he appears to be moving fwd in life things ... School jobs friends responsibility and personal care ... Then I'm thinking I'm really ok with it. If I see those benchmarks start to fall then I'm gonna get concerned that there's too much or maybe moved onto something else. He's not a big drinker so I'm not really worried about that.

As I have been reading the recent discussions in this forum, I can't help but reconsider what behaviors and activities I should ride out and those which I need to intervene/stop. Generally my attitude is that I want DS to be an independent man who has experience and sense to handle a variety of challenging situations in the future and who does not need to rebel in order to have these experiences. I want him to be prepared to make well-considered decisions in college and not make unhealthy choices re: alcohol/drugs.

I think back to the Xbox phase and the Call of Duty like games that DS played with his social circle and am grateful that stage ran its course. We put limits on it but he naturally lost interest eventually. Then there was what I refer to as the skate punk phase when he took the metro downtown with friends and skateboarded at different spots and interacted with a range of people!and influences, good and bad. He plays a HS sport with all older kids and has been exposed to drinking and smoking which are things I don't want him to experiment with but I want him to know how to handle what may be more of peer "attraction" vs peer pressure situations. I don't want him to chew but I don't have a huge problem with vaping non-nicotine vape liquid. DS and I talk a lot so I have a pretty good sense where he with his experimentation and experiences and he is aware of the limits and reasoning, primarily health related.

How much do you allow your teen to experiment? Where are your lines between riding out what you hope is a fad and putting your foot down?