How fancy is this dinner that it has to be charged to a credit card? Can't you just throw a chicken in the oven? You can make a cake from a mix for about $5. You don't need to buy a $40 cake from a bakery.

If it's just a family dinner, why are you charging up your credit card? Make it potluck if you can't afford groceries. Why are you buying a present for someone who clearly does not want a birthday celebration. Give him your brother some peace and he'll come around a lot more.

Anonymous wrote:Move?

...move on.

No. It's your dad's birthday.

And next time don't go into debt for someone else unless it's for your kid and it's a NEED, not a WANT.

Don't get another cake. Just celebrate your dads birthday. Your brother doesn't care.

Good Lord! My in-laws are just like this. Birthdays for adults do not require a mandatory celebration. It almost seems like a joke that an adult has to have a birthday dinner that includes presents and a cake. And apparently he must answer the phone 15 times that day to say thank you for wishing him a happy birthday which isn't happy because his phone is ringing off the hook. None of that is relaxing. Chances are his birthday wish is to spend the day on the sofa watching TV (or whatever his favorite recreation is). Maybe he prefers dinner at a nice restaurant with him wife. Leave the man alone already.

Move?

Your brother obviously isn't interested in celebrating his birthday with you. Take the hint and move.

No need for a separate cake at all.

Since my brother got married 3 years ago, he has completely limited his contact with our family. Despite living 20 mins away, he only calls the day before a holiday to ask what time dinner will be. Our calls and texts repeatedly go unanswered. His birthday was two weeks ago and we called multiple times to see if he wanted to do something. He never responded except to say thanks for the birthday wishes.

My father's birthday is today and my brother and sil are coming to our house for dinner. I have a gift for my brother but am debating whether or not to spend the money for a separate birthday cake for him in addition to my fathers cake so they both can blow out candles. DH and I are low on funds so this entire evening is being put on our credit card. I just want others opinions. We asked multiple times to take him out to dinner on the day or weekend before or after but he didn't respond. I would normally roll out the red carpet for siblings birthdays but this year, am just not feeling it. What to do?