That's a good scale. Wish I'd had it a few years ago when I was in this boat.

OP, the irrational pet lovers will be here soon enough to rip you a new one, but for now it's people who get it. I've been where you are w/ 2 cats and was lucky to find a home for one where he could be the center of attention until his health truly failed. The other I got from a no-kill rescue that took him back.

You can try to activate your network and hope to find someone in a smaller space who can give him attention, the sterotypical little old lady. but I agree (and said on o=your other thread) that the cat is healthy--I think this is the beginning of her ailing if she's not bothering to go to the litterbox.

I hope your DH appreciates what he's doing by pushing you on this. I had one partner who didn't but my DH had been a pet owner many times over and understood the gravity of the ultimatum he'd set me to get rid of my aging outside-the-box pee-er.

I didn't read the part about the DH.
He is an ass no doubt. But if the OP is not going to stand up for her cat, euthanasia is the kindest option.

Anonymous wrote:Your DH is the horrible person here.

I would draw a hard line about trying a litter box in a new place before calling it a day--and pressing the vet about there being some source of pain that might be treated. Your cat is probably getting old and uncomfortable if she is not willing to go downstairs to use the litter box.

Check out the first quality of life scale here to see if it is close to time:

http://www.lapoflove.com/Quality-of-Life/Determining-Pet-Quality-of-Life

We put our cat down last week due to cancer and that scale helped us determine when it was time.

And, fwiw, DH took time off work to go with me, and it is possibly the only time I have seen him cry outside of a movie theater. Your DH needn't love the cat, but he could show some common decency for the cat and you.

In defense of my spouse, he's been very grudgingly putting up with the animal for more than ten years. She has peed in many other places. She's a very anxious cat. Between cat pee and cat puke he's pretty much beside himself and can't stand it. His natural inclination would be to throw her out the front door at first offense, so he's put in a lot of time tolerating her already. This is pretty much the last straw for him.

Anonymous wrote:Your DH is the horrible person here.

I would draw a hard line about trying a litter box in a new place before calling it a day--and pressing the vet about there being some source of pain that might be treated. Your cat is probably getting old and uncomfortable if she is not willing to go downstairs to use the litter box.

Check out the first quality of life scale here to see if it is close to time:

http://www.lapoflove.com/Quality-of-Life/Determining-Pet-Quality-of-Life

We put our cat down last week due to cancer and that scale helped us determine when it was time.

And, fwiw, DH took time off work to go with me, and it is possibly the only time I have seen him cry outside of a movie theater. Your DH needn't love the cat, but he could show some common decency for the cat and you.

I agree. Your DH is an ass, OP.

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure she doesn't have a UTI?

Yes. Extremely clean bill of health from vet. Urine and blood tests all perfect.

Your DH is the horrible person here.

I would draw a hard line about trying a litter box in a new place before calling it a day--and pressing the vet about there being some source of pain that might be treated. Your cat is probably getting old and uncomfortable if she is not willing to go downstairs to use the litter box.

Check out the first quality of life scale here to see if it is close to time:

http://www.lapoflove.com/Quality-of-Life/Determining-Pet-Quality-of-Life

We put our cat down last week due to cancer and that scale helped us determine when it was time.

And, fwiw, DH took time off work to go with me, and it is possibly the only time I have seen him cry outside of a movie theater. Your DH needn't love the cat, but he could show some common decency for the cat and you.

Are you sure she doesn't have a UTI?

This is such a tough situation OP. Have you tried Feliawy? One of those plug in cat pheremones?

Anonymous wrote:So, the kinder route is the needle, then? I am having a really hard time accepting that it's fine to kill the cat. I would keep her and deal with having a litter box where I don't want it. My husband on the other hand can't tolerate the idea of a litter box anywhere near him or his stuff, ever, for any reason. I want to do what's right by this animal but I don't know what that really is.

It's more humane to euthanize a cat that ever pees outside the liter box regardless of age. You will cause another person to have to put it down.

Anonymous wrote:Open your back door and let it free

Not happening. I'd rather euthanize her "nicely" rather than provide our local own a nice snack, or our roadway some new roadkill.

So, the kinder route is the needle, then? I am having a really hard time accepting that it's fine to kill the cat. I would keep her and deal with having a litter box where I don't want it. My husband on the other hand can't tolerate the idea of a litter box anywhere near him or his stuff, ever, for any reason. I want to do what's right by this animal but I don't know what that really is.

Open your back door and let it free

Agree with PP.
Ask yourself who might want a cat who pees outside the litter box, when even her longtime owners can't take it.

Sorry, I don't think you re-home a cat that pees outside of the litter box. There's technically nothing terrible about euthanizing a 13 year old cat with peeing problems.

I'm OP of the "diagnose cat's need to pee on bathroom rugs" thread. Husband has made clear that cat must go, one way or another. I'd prefer she go to new home rather than death row. She has a clean bill of health, but is peeing outside her litterbox in the areas that are just at the periphery of her "territory" (sleeping space), rather than taking a hike downstairs to use the box.

Nutshell version: scaredy-cat with need for nearby litterbox in need of new housing situation, pronto. How to go about this? Recommendations for finding a good home that isn't a dogfighting ring leader masquerading as animal lover?

Yes, I know I'm a horrible pet owner. No need to tell me about my promises to my pet when adopting her (from an overcrowded shelter, FWIW, so she may not have made it past kittenhood had she not come to live with me for 13 years). I get that it's shitty, but it needs to happen. Please help me do it as gently and kindly as possible.