Anonymous
Post 04/13/2015 08:02     Subject: Re:I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
I think it is kind.

I am very happy that my ex's (boyfriends not husbands) are doing well. One was a train wreck right after we dated and now he is with somebody amazing and I am so happy for him.

If my H and I divorce I will truly hope he has an amazing life. (and yes, he cheated on me... so it may go south who knows)
Anonymous
Post 04/13/2015 07:19     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If it has been a significant amount of time since you two split, then I think it is time to seek professional help.

Talking to a therapist about your hurt feelings and trying to work through them will give you the closure you haven't given yourself.

Without closure, you can never move forward....Past how he wronged you.


Nah, the OP isn't obsessing on this and like a PP pointed out its normal to feel this way after such a revelation. It'll pass for OP.


Thanks for the credit, this was speaking from experience. A lot of friends said things about her after the fact, and some of it was dead on, other times I had to share stories that debunked their theories.

Anonymous
Post 04/13/2015 06:32     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
Anonymous wrote:If it has been a significant amount of time since you two split, then I think it is time to seek professional help.

Talking to a therapist about your hurt feelings and trying to work through them will give you the closure you haven't given yourself.

Without closure, you can never move forward....Past how he wronged you.


What the OP is going through is normal. Professional help? Silly.
Anonymous
Post 04/13/2015 06:24     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
Anonymous wrote:If it has been a significant amount of time since you two split, then I think it is time to seek professional help.

Talking to a therapist about your hurt feelings and trying to work through them will give you the closure you haven't given yourself.

Without closure, you can never move forward....Past how he wronged you.


Nah, the OP isn't obsessing on this and like a PP pointed out its normal to feel this way after such a revelation. It'll pass for OP.
Anonymous
Post 04/13/2015 01:53     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
If it has been a significant amount of time since you two split, then I think it is time to seek professional help.

Talking to a therapist about your hurt feelings and trying to work through them will give you the closure you haven't given yourself.

Without closure, you can never move forward....Past how he wronged you.
Anonymous
Post 04/12/2015 20:44     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
Anonymous wrote:I have no idea where my ex is, but I think it is human nature to still "care" for someone that you were with for a period of time. Sure, some people may think karma hit them, but it isn't right to hope for bad things to happen to people that you were in love with at one time. The hope is they got the help they needed to deal with their deep down emotions.


Yes exactly on your last point.

Maybe it doesn't give me relief because in all likelihood another woman or two was hurt in the process. In other words he probably still hasn't learned anything and is hurting more people.
Anonymous
Post 04/12/2015 19:49     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
I have no idea where my ex is, but I think it is human nature to still "care" for someone that you were with for a period of time. Sure, some people may think karma hit them, but it isn't right to hope for bad things to happen to people that you were in love with at one time. The hope is they got the help they needed to deal with their deep down emotions.
Anonymous
Post 04/12/2015 19:47     Subject: I should be happy or relieved but I'm not
Found out today that my ex, who cheated on me and exploded our relationship out of nowhere, is single again. It should be a relief that it confirms he is very unstable and had nothing to do with me. But it doesn't feel that way. I'm still sad that someone I cared about hurt me so badly. Can anyone relate?