Anonymous
04/11/2015 08:37
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Anonymous wrote:
Thank you, OP,
For supporting your SIL in this extremely tough situation! She's brave enough to say it out loud and hopefully protect other children.
Sending good thoughts your way, and hugs to your SIL.
+1 (SA survivor)
Anonymous
04/11/2015 08:25
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Proof that SIL relationships aren't all bad. What a blessing you are to yours.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 08:13
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Thank you for the supportive comments.
The saddest, stupidest thing is that I thought mother in law would support her daughter a little. Like do something resembling support. Not the complete freaking opposite.
Selfishly I was hoping we could still have one parent/grandparent(meaning MIL) from DHs family. But her support of the pedophile means we've lost both of them.
Obviously there are bigger fish to fry in this whole ordeal. And more important issues to tackle.
Also I'm just so enraged that a mother could suck this much. And obviously a father too. I think the rage towards mil right now is because I'm first hand witnessing her (in)actions. Whereas FILs are more vague/past tense to me, but obviously much more horrific.
The saddest, stupidest thing is that I thought mother in law would support her daughter a little. Like do something resembling support. Not the complete freaking opposite.
Selfishly I was hoping we could still have one parent/grandparent(meaning MIL) from DHs family. But her support of the pedophile means we've lost both of them.
Obviously there are bigger fish to fry in this whole ordeal. And more important issues to tackle.
Also I'm just so enraged that a mother could suck this much. And obviously a father too. I think the rage towards mil right now is because I'm first hand witnessing her (in)actions. Whereas FILs are more vague/past tense to me, but obviously much more horrific.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 07:23
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
I'm so glad you're there for your SIL -- and that she had the courage to come forward to keep your family safe. Best wishes to all of you.
FWIW, my wife was sexually abused by her father and none of the immediate family would acknowledge it. The way she coped? She moved 3000 miles away and has had no contact at all with them for 15 years. If the MIL and FIL are completely committed to denial, cutting them off entirely may be the right choice. It did wonders for my wife's mental health.
FWIW, my wife was sexually abused by her father and none of the immediate family would acknowledge it. The way she coped? She moved 3000 miles away and has had no contact at all with them for 15 years. If the MIL and FIL are completely committed to denial, cutting them off entirely may be the right choice. It did wonders for my wife's mental health.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 07:17
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Anonymous wrote:
Very very sad, though I have to say that you never ultimately know in these cases who did what.
I'd hate to find out the hard way that she was telling the truth. Oh wait, maybe the kids would also be lying.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 06:11
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Very very sad, though I have to say that you never ultimately know in these cases who did what.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 04:38
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
So sad a time for your family. I'm sorry.
Anonymous
04/11/2015 02:03
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
What gift your sister in law has given your family. Believe her. Take precautions. Use the therapy to sort out how you'll deal with MIL & FIL, esp if she'll be staying by his side in all of this.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:30
Subject: Re:My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Hugs to you and yours, OP.
I am so glad you are all getting therapeutic support, too. There is a long road ahead for your DH (I assume it's his dad) and that impacts family dynamics, and there will be questions your kids will have as they grow about why they don't see their grandparents, etc.,. The objective therapy and the coping skills will help.
Peace to your SIL: what a brave woman she is!
I am so glad you are all getting therapeutic support, too. There is a long road ahead for your DH (I assume it's his dad) and that impacts family dynamics, and there will be questions your kids will have as they grow about why they don't see their grandparents, etc.,. The objective therapy and the coping skills will help.
Peace to your SIL: what a brave woman she is!
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:25
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Glad you are standing by your SIL and protecting your kids, OP.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:20
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Anonymous wrote:That's terrible. I am a little confused as to why you need therapy, but whatever. I could see why the SIL needs it, or your husband needs it, but if it helps you that's great.
I'm sure your SIL appreciates your support.
We are going to therapy together to figure out how to handle the situation. We're are a united front as the therapist likes to say.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:19
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
She did it to protect MY children. I am forever grateful to her.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:18
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
That's terrible. I am a little confused as to why you need therapy, but whatever. I could see why the SIL needs it, or your husband needs it, but if it helps you that's great.
I'm sure your SIL appreciates your support.
I'm sure your SIL appreciates your support.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:18
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Thank you, OP,
For supporting your SIL in this extremely tough situation! She's brave enough to say it out loud and hopefully protect other children.
Sending good thoughts your way, and hugs to your SIL.
Anonymous
04/10/2015 23:14
Subject: My SIL told the family that her father sexually abused her for 10 years
Fil denies it
Mil has not reached out to SIL AT ALL. It's been 5 days. If this was my kid, I would be doing anything I could to offer support. All she cares about is her pedophile of a husband. Mil's been playing character assassination where she claims that SIL is unstable, bipolar etc. she's very obviously not anyf these things.
Fil is a scumbag (I mean everyone thinks he's fabulous. Has a great career - pulls in aside 7 figures a year etc, friends love him, but I believe he did this). But I expected MIL to not suck completely. She can't do anything but support her husband. Ugh makes me sick. I don't want to see either of them ever again.
We are seeking therapy with a well respected therapist in this field. But I'm still just so pissed at my in laws for sucking.
Mil has not reached out to SIL AT ALL. It's been 5 days. If this was my kid, I would be doing anything I could to offer support. All she cares about is her pedophile of a husband. Mil's been playing character assassination where she claims that SIL is unstable, bipolar etc. she's very obviously not anyf these things.
Fil is a scumbag (I mean everyone thinks he's fabulous. Has a great career - pulls in aside 7 figures a year etc, friends love him, but I believe he did this). But I expected MIL to not suck completely. She can't do anything but support her husband. Ugh makes me sick. I don't want to see either of them ever again.
We are seeking therapy with a well respected therapist in this field. But I'm still just so pissed at my in laws for sucking.