Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 20:40     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
I would also add that with SN kids, at least for me there is an Extra layer of worry about whether I am choosing the right therapies, enough of the right therapies. Do I have enough money to get the therapies. It's so painful. So many docs don't even work with insurance at all and we pay so much up front and have to fight for reimbursement.

This is my first and only child so I can't compare with a NT child. and as for activities, there is a more limited arena of activites for a child with special needs.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 20:03     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:Well, maybe because I've been at this for a long time, but I feel like it comes in fits and spurts. Shuttling your SN child to appointments is the same time commitment as shuttling your NT kids to activities. Researching camps and activities is time consuming for all of your kids. IEPs are once a year. I have more meetings a year than most, but really they add up to about once a week at school before I head off to work. Research is intense periodically, but once your child is diagnosed and you've gained an understanding of his or her issues, research is an occasional issue. So it's different and involves more than my NT kids. And on some days it feels heavy, but that's probably worry. But, most of the time, I don't feel like I devote an overwhelming amount of time.


You cannot compare activities to therapy and all involved with a typical kid. You do not get it. We do activities and therapy on top of full day school. Insurance is a nightmare, constant eva,hat ions with each person saying something different and homework from school and therapies. No,mactivities are not equal to therapy. We cannot send out child to camp. He is with me all summer. I do not get if your chikd is special needs that you are not devoting a lot of time to it or you just do not care and let it be others issue
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:51     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:Well, maybe because I've been at this for a long time, but I feel like it comes in fits and spurts. Shuttling your SN child to appointments is the same time commitment as shuttling your NT kids to activities. Researching camps and activities is time consuming for all of your kids. IEPs are once a year. I have more meetings a year than most, but really they add up to about once a week at school before I head off to work. Research is intense periodically, but once your child is diagnosed and you've gained an understanding of his or her issues, research is an occasional issue. So it's different and involves more than my NT kids. And on some days it feels heavy, but that's probably worry. But, most of the time, I don't feel like I devote an overwhelming amount of time.


Lucky you. I realize my kid won't be headed for college, will struggle to learn basic activities of daily living, and I don't know WTF I'm going to do long term in terms of housing and occupation even if it's volunteer after I'm dead.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:49     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:Between the therapy appts, keeping in contact with teachers and school, dealing with IEP paperwork, medical and insurance paperwork, figuring out worthwhile activities/programs/camps and looking into funding all of the above, educating myself about the system and SN parenting I feel like I do little else. And my kid's needs are probably in the "moderate" range. Vent over.


Yep! My job is my vacation/down time. 3pm is when the shit hits the fan for me and it pretty much doesn't stop till 8pm. Tutors, therapy, homework which he cannot do on his own in spite of him being in 6th grade. I lie awake sick with worry just about every day of my life.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:43     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Well, maybe because I've been at this for a long time, but I feel like it comes in fits and spurts. Shuttling your SN child to appointments is the same time commitment as shuttling your NT kids to activities. Researching camps and activities is time consuming for all of your kids. IEPs are once a year. I have more meetings a year than most, but really they add up to about once a week at school before I head off to work. Research is intense periodically, but once your child is diagnosed and you've gained an understanding of his or her issues, research is an occasional issue. So it's different and involves more than my NT kids. And on some days it feels heavy, but that's probably worry. But, most of the time, I don't feel like I devote an overwhelming amount of time.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:36     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Troll alert on this thread!

So, back on topic. OP, you have my full sympathy. I quit my job to stay home and look after DC1 when we realized his special needs were much more significant than we thought. Therapy appointments every day and dealing with insurance.
Now I have several children and volunteer instead of working and DC1's needs are lighter - well, I'm still rather busy!
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:27     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Every kid is a FT job. If you don't do the work, you pay someone else to do it.


Your not getting it. Every kid does not have therapy appointments weekly, multiple yearly doctor appointments, insurance claims, special services at school, etc.

OP, agreed fully. Its exhausting. We have been in therapy 4 out of 5 days a week. I needed one day a week break.

Ok, Ms Special.


Look, not to make you feel less special, but it's more than just appointments and shuttling. You read up on the different disorders, you're given homework from OTs, SPED teachers, SLPs, psychologists. Then you're supposed to have the patience, time, and understanding to implement all the techniques used everywhere else. And good luck if you have more than one SN kid. You go bankrupt on therapy and SN schools. You forego home repairs, family vacations, new clothes for yourself.

Then you get this boost from sh*theads who wander in from Gen'l Parenting wanting their validation. 20 points, PP, if you can tell me without googling what the letters "DSM" stand for.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:03     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Every kid is a FT job. If you don't do the work, you pay someone else to do it.


Your not getting it. Every kid does not have therapy appointments weekly, multiple yearly doctor appointments, insurance claims, special services at school, etc.

OP, agreed fully. Its exhausting. We have been in therapy 4 out of 5 days a week. I needed one day a week break.

Ok, Ms Special.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 19:00     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Anonymous wrote:Every kid is a FT job. If you don't do the work, you pay someone else to do it.


Your not getting it. Every kid does not have therapy appointments weekly, multiple yearly doctor appointments, insurance claims, special services at school, etc.

OP, agreed fully. Its exhausting. We have been in therapy 4 out of 5 days a week. I needed one day a week break.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 18:56     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Every kid is a FT job. If you don't do the work, you pay someone else to do it.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 18:54     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
seriously!!
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 18:01     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Ha, someone asked me "what I used to do." All I could think was "have more free time."
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 17:52     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
you are not alone...it might be the weather, but I just have my plate full, and is not even dinner time yet.

Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 17:44     Subject: Re:I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Preach it sister!
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2015 17:29     Subject: I feel like my kid is a full-time job
Between the therapy appts, keeping in contact with teachers and school, dealing with IEP paperwork, medical and insurance paperwork, figuring out worthwhile activities/programs/camps and looking into funding all of the above, educating myself about the system and SN parenting I feel like I do little else. And my kid's needs are probably in the "moderate" range. Vent over.