PPs, name specific schools and provide details where you claim this is happening. Otherwise, my skepticism is high.

Anonymous wrote:Exactly PP! Our school loses the good kids and the bullies remain. I get that independent schools are a business, but it would be nice for them to live up to their missions. The biggest clue is to look at what policies are in writing for all to see. Don't trust anything that's not in writing and then know that rules will be bent a lot of the time even if it is in writing.

+1 that goes for ANY promises made as well (get it in writing).

Anonymous wrote:I've noticed here that some private schools here have a very high tolerance for poor behavior. I think if the parents make a significant donation, the school turns the other way.

BINGO!!! witnessed this first hand working at a DC private.

Which schools have discipline problems? We're waiting on decisions and would hate to spend 30k+ only to find out there are major issues. I know that issues arise at every school but which schools don't handle them well?

Exactly PP! Our school loses the good kids and the bullies remain. I get that independent schools are a business, but it would be nice for them to live up to their missions. The biggest clue is to look at what policies are in writing for all to see. Don't trust anything that's not in writing and then know that rules will be bent a lot of the time even if it is in writing.

Discipline? That's why the good kids leave. Doesn't exist.

I've noticed here that some private schools here have a very high tolerance for poor behavior. I think if the parents make a significant donation, the school turns the other way.

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the school. We've had kids fight, bring weapons to school, plagiarize, and lie year after year and the same kid walks free in the halls everyday. IME privates are even slacker with regards to discipline than public. They out on a front to attract families but when it comes to it they don't enforce equitably if at all. Wonder if it was different pre-recession.

That depends in which part of the hood do you live.
My dd would get kicked out of her school just for swearing.
What you are describing is crazy

I think it depends on the school. We had a neighbor who was kicked out for cheating on the first offense at a notoriously strict school. I think a lot of schools though are more lax especially when "important" people are involved.

Public schools don't have dress codes which gets kids demerits. I've heard of schools where kids have to do manual labor if they got a certain number of demerits.

Placed my son at a Big 3 for the traditional learning environment and dress code. He conformed which was my objective transitioning from a public elementary school.

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the school. We've had kids fight, bring weapons to school, plagiarize, and lie year after year and the same kid walks free in the halls everyday. IME privates are even slacker with regards to discipline than public. They out on a front to attract families but when it comes to it they don't enforce equitably if at all. Wonder if it was different pre-recession.

Sounds terrible. What school?

Privates have more leeway for counseling out/expelling than publics do....privates can make their own rules to a certain degree...and do not have to answer to the parents as much...this is similar to teachers at privates being "let go" more easily than at publics....

Depends on the school. We've had kids fight, bring weapons to school, plagiarize, and lie year after year and the same kid walks free in the halls everyday. IME privates are even slacker with regards to discipline than public. They out on a front to attract families but when it comes to it they don't enforce equitably if at all. Wonder if it was different pre-recession.

It depends on the private. Catholic schools seem to be the strictest. Episcopal, non-sectarian, not so much. Friends say money talks and kids are often coddled, people look the other way. That said, it is true they tend not to be disruptive in class.

It strikes me that privates have more rules and/or higher expectations for how kids comport themselves. Kids get thrown out for offenses that might merit detention at publics. Cheating seems to be taken very seriously at privates. I say this after experience at publics and privates.