Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks, we're in Falls Church City. I would love my dad to be right down the street so we can stop in easily, pick him up for dinner, he can see the grand kids.
I think he'd like a social environment where there are other older folks like himself. (He's a big talker). Plus, he's not the best at cooking and cleaning for himself.

We're contemplating having him simply rent an apt nearby and we'd hire help, but community would be better. He goes out and walks the dog every day, stops to talk w neighbors, neighbors stop in to visit. The sunrise place down the street has 'wine and cheese' parties every week, and group meals. Being by himself would not be good I fear. (My mom is dying, they just celebrated their 50th, and he's very dependent). To be honest, the folks at the FC sunrise place seemed so, um, old. My dad is 80, but he'd be the spry young one there. S I can't tell if he'd find friends or not. That's another reason I was thinking of an 'independent living' type place. Maybe the ppl would be more able bodied? He can still drive, but only just barely (my mom is always in the car). Him being alone up in PA is just an accident waiting to happen, plus being depressed.

He wouldn't move for another year, but I just wanted a plan in place. I do feel so lucky he can afford these expensive places.

I might look at this--an apartment building with 24-hour front desk, and hire someone who can check up on him daily. It seems expensive to do this, but compared to senior facilities it is not. Does he have neighbors that he is friendly with already? If so, I wouldn't move him from the neighborhood.

OP, I am wondering if have considered a continuing care retirement community, where there are levels of care from independent living to Memory care and Skilled nursing.

These places exist to ease the difficulty of moving loved ones when their situation changes, as happens very quickly at that age, and is a huge added stressor, for the person and the family trying to scramble and make decisions.

I understand he is a spry 80 year old now, but would suggest looking a little more into the future with your planning.

I have worked in assisted living, skilled nursing and continuing care facilities for years as a clinician, so that is where my advise is coming from

Before I had kids, I worked as a project administrator (secretary) for a construction company--we were building a Sunrise facility (this was in another state) and my job was "onsite"--so I was right there as the facility was under construction, right up until residents moved in.

I remember, when I saw the units, being surprised that they didn't have full kitchens, but was told by the Sunrise personnel that is standard in any form of "assisted living"--that a microwave is the most they allow. I don't know if this is the standard for that state, or nationwide?

Goodwin House in Alexandria - Skyline and Bailey's Crossroads, I believe. You have to buy in, which many people can afford by selling their home. It is also a true continuing care facility, and many are not. For example, the Jefferson (at Ballston) kicks you out if you need long term nursing care at the end of your life.

OP here. Thanks, we're in Falls Church City. I would love my dad to be right down the street so we can stop in easily, pick him up for dinner, he can see the grand kids.
I think he'd like a social environment where there are other older folks like himself. (He's a big talker). Plus, he's not the best at cooking and cleaning for himself.

We're contemplating having him simply rent an apt nearby and we'd hire help, but community would be better. He goes out and walks the dog every day, stops to talk w neighbors, neighbors stop in to visit. The sunrise place down the street has 'wine and cheese' parties every week, and group meals. Being by himself would not be good I fear. (My mom is dying, they just celebrated their 50th, and he's very dependent). To be honest, the folks at the FC sunrise place seemed so, um, old. My dad is 80, but he'd be the spry young one there. S I can't tell if he'd find friends or not. That's another reason I was thinking of an 'independent living' type place. Maybe the ppl would be more able bodied? He can still drive, but only just barely (my mom is always in the car). Him being alone up in PA is just an accident waiting to happen, plus being depressed.

He wouldn't move for another year, but I just wanted a plan in place. I do feel so lucky he can afford these expensive places.

A relative of mine is in assisted living and one of her friends recently moved to a more independent retirement community - Ashby Ponds in Ashburn. Looks nice.

Op I highly recommend that you read Atul gawande's being mortal before you place him. It's a quick read and will change the way you look at care for the elderly

Where are you located?

Yes friends have been to Vinson Hall and have made an initial deposit for several years down the road probably in their mid-70s.

Is he a retired Fed 14 or above or retired officer?

Vinson Hall

My parents live at Ingleside. Pricy but they love it. Right next to Rock Creek and allows dogs.

I'm not sure what your budget is, or how far you far you willing to travel, but check out the link below.

A friend of mine works there which is how I discovered them. I can't speak to the Leesburg location, but it gets great reviews online. I was looking for a place for my grandma, and the cost is the only thing that prevented us from choosing them. Although cheaper than some other places, it was still out of our price range. We had no idea how expensive these places would be.

http://www.morningsidehouse.com/assisted_living/Leesburg_VA/zip_20175/morningside_house/2239

Good luck

OP here--thanks, I saw that website. Aplaceformom.com, but it seems like a personal referral service. I would have to give my phone no, etc. I could though, if anyone thought that service was worthwhile.

Asbury Methodist?

I think there are now consultants (a place for mom or something like that?) who will point you in the right direction.

Can anyone recommend a good website or other resource for finding local independent/assisted living homes?

I'm looking for my dad who is almost 80. He's slowing, but I can't imagine he'd enjoy being without a full kitchen, losing that freedom. He'd love that all his meals are cooked for him, and the social nature of it. (At least I hope he'd enjoy it!)
I saw a Sunrise facility in Ballston, but that's a little too urban--no parks nearby. He'll have a dog. We're in falls church, but the Sunrise here has mini kitchenettes and super small rooms. Is that the norm? Any other suggestions? Thanks!