We held back our July bday DS and it was a good decision for us. Repeated PK though at different schools which made it easier. First school ended at PK so everyone was leaving. Then DS went to an independent school at PK entry. Definitely on the older side in the grade but not the oldest in the class. Academically he was capable but socially very shy and quiet. He needed the extra year (and the small school environment) to get comfortable and build his confidence. In addition, he turned out to be a late reader so the extra year was helpful which is something we hadn't anticipated. We have never regretted this decision but bottom line, I do think this decision is dependent on the child and what would be best for the child. Would they be bored repeating? Do they need time to socially develop? Good luck.

I have a June boy and held back. Best decision. Never met a family who regret holding back, plenty who wish they would have. Much easier to hold back now than 4th or 8th. May seem harsh now, but as they get to be in 3rd grade and older, you'll be glad you did. Has nothing to do with academics, more social and self esteem.

Anonymous wrote:We got that advice and didn't take it. Our son just really seemed ready to go. When pressed, teacher stated she makes that recommendation all the time for boys with summer birthdays so it wasn't that he was not mature. He's now in 5th grade and I'm glad we didn't wait. He really belongs with his current peers.

Smh at this practice.

OP, isnt it a bit early for the teacher to make this suggestion?

Anonymous wrote:We have 3 summer b'day kids. With the oldest, the teacher said he was ready to go, so we sent him on. In the long run (he's 24 now), this worked out fine, but middle school and 9th grade were rough. He's very bright, but was behind in terms of organizational skills. Similarly, despite being sociable and friendly, he lagged behind his peers in emotional maturity. We held back his younger brother and sister (both did an "extra" year of preschool, and didn't see the same problems. Instead, teachers often commented on their maturity and sense of responsibility.

I have a son with a July birthday at an independent school. He is in middle school, and sounds very much like the boy described above. The teachers have expressed concerns about his need to take more responsibility. I am not sure they recognize that he is 1 to 1 1/2 years younger than his classmates. Academically, he is thriving. It is a tough call to make when you have a bright child with a late birthday. We discussed this at length when he was ready for K. My husband was worried he would be bored and possibly act out if we held him back a year. He still believes we made the right call, whereas I am not so sure.

We have 3 summer b'day kids. With the oldest, the teacher said he was ready to go, so we sent him on. In the long run (he's 24 now), this worked out fine, but middle school and 9th grade were rough. He's very bright, but was behind in terms of organizational skills. Similarly, despite being sociable and friendly, he lagged behind his peers in emotional maturity. We held back his younger brother and sister (both did an "extra" year of preschool, and didn't see the same problems. Instead, teachers often commented on their maturity and sense of responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We got that advice and didn't take it. Our son just really seemed ready to go. When pressed, teacher stated she makes that recommendation all the time for boys with summer birthdays so it wasn't that he was not mature. He's now in 5th grade and I'm glad we didn't wait. He really belongs with his current peers.

So then did you move him to a different school for kindergarten? Curious. Thanks

At the time he was in the private preschool around the corner (they had no K). He went to public kindergarten so it was a different school. If you're in a preK-8 or 12 then I can see where it could be tough to go against a recommendation.

I would drill down with the teacher what exactly are her concerns. If they seem to track what you notice at home, I would consider it. This isn't the same thing as redshirting. Some kids are legitimately not ready to advance to the next grade. My DH did this at K with a July birthday 40 years ago. He has three Ivy League degrees now, but, according to his mom, he did need the extra year to mature and catch up on his reading skills.

At our school, every year 2-3 kids (mostly boys with summer bdays) repeat PK. Then 2-3 repeat K and 1-2 repeat 1st. It's no big deal.

Anonymous wrote:We got that advice and didn't take it. Our son just really seemed ready to go. When pressed, teacher stated she makes that recommendation all the time for boys with summer birthdays so it wasn't that he was not mature. He's now in 5th grade and I'm glad we didn't wait. He really belongs with his current peers.

So then did you move him to a different school for kindergarten? Curious. Thanks

We got that advice and didn't take it. Our son just really seemed ready to go. When pressed, teacher stated she makes that recommendation all the time for boys with summer birthdays so it wasn't that he was not mature. He's now in 5th grade and I'm glad we didn't wait. He really belongs with his current peers.

Anonymous wrote:I listened and held. Her teacher had been in the classroom for many years and I trusted her judgement. Gr. 7 now and sofar I feel it was a good move. BTW we repeated in the same class. It was fine since usually at least one child does anyway.

Agree. Many people hold back summer bdays. If you don't, he will be one year or more younger.

They just want to get your money for another year.

I wish I had listened, it's a major regret of mine. At PreK, I'd stay at the same school assuming they and you both want that.

I listened and held. Her teacher had been in the classroom for many years and I trusted her judgement. Gr. 7 now and sofar I feel it was a good move. BTW we repeated in the same class. It was fine since usually at least one child does anyway.

Anyone ever experienced this situation where prek teacher Does not recommend advancing your child to kindergarten next year at your private school as they feel they are too young and not quite ready? If so, how have you handled? Switched schools?