OP here, I want to lighten up. I do it all the time but if I am going to take 1+ hour during my work day (with horrid traffic because of weather) and I have to spend 30 minutes playing nice to a kid that has a quiet voice to recite things I can learn from the website. Well, yes, I can lighten up, I guess.
I have found that the most useful school tours are given by parent volunteers, they are always frank, honest and brutal when they have to.
You can't ask a kid about cost of field trips, fundraising, cost of lunches, waitlist, commute, etc. Having an adult would really really help.
So, far, best tours? Inspired Teaching and Mundo Verde... by FAR.