Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HHI $250

Degree in Math, work in IT.
H degree in finance, master in SW... Work in SW.

I tell my kids grade don't matter until HS. That have to give a best effort ... No more that 3 hrs of hw in middle school. No more than 1.5 hrs before that.

I have opted my kids out of certain he for various reasons. I don't believe I making up work during illnesses that last more than a week.

In HS they have to live with their consequences when it comes to choosing what college they go to.

You sound like a very calm parent. I wish I was more like this. Many of my friends are tiger moms and I have developed anxiety over school and pushing them enough. I'm trying as the New Year began to be more relaxed about school and grades and making sure my kids enjoy childhood... but it's hard in my neighborhood....

Thanks for not correcting my mis-spellings.

I have the benefit of having grown up here and have years of practice dealing with this area. I also have numerous wildly successful friends and family members that did not get good grades. My H sometimes freaks out about my "calmness" he says I am insouciant.

Stay strong.

HHI 130
1 MA, 3 MS


I would never undermine a teacher by telling my child the homework assigned is not important. If there was a pattern of pointless busy work coming home, I'd change schools.

We had the opposite problem at a couple schools: I would tell my children how important it is to turn work in on time but the teachers didn't and would accept late work for full credit. Made me nuts.

DH has a BS and earns $230k, I am MBA and a SAHM. My kids do all the homework that has to be turned in, and we do the reading logs. However, for spelling, if they know all the words already at the beginning of the week, I don't make them do the mindless busy work of writing each word 5 times or similar. But if they had to turn in the spelling study work, I would definitely have them do it.

Anonymous wrote:HHI $250

Degree in Math, work in IT.
H degree in finance, master in SW... Work in SW.

I tell my kids grade don't matter until HS. That have to give a best effort ... No more that 3 hrs of hw in middle school. No more than 1.5 hrs before that.

I have opted my kids out of certain he for various reasons. I don't believe I making up work during illnesses that last more than a week.

In HS they have to live with their consequences when it comes to choosing what college they go to.

How the hell often are your kids sick for more than a week?!

UMC, JD/PhD household.

Kid is in preK. He leaves at 8am and gets home at 6pm. We have a couple of small homework activites assigned each week, plus a reading log to fill out. I generally scribble down what we've read that week and send that back, and leave it at that. My kid will do homework once he gets homework that I believe will have some educational benefit--either the content of the homework or the point at which he's able to learn some self-discipline. I do think learning self-discipline and keeping oneself on undesired tasks is important. I just don't think my 5 year old has the capacity to learn it after a ten hour day. When he gets home, he needs to eat a good meal and wind down with family.

Anonymous wrote:HHI $250

Degree in Math, work in IT.
H degree in finance, master in SW... Work in SW.

I tell my kids grade don't matter until HS. That have to give a best effort ... No more that 3 hrs of hw in middle school. No more than 1.5 hrs before that.

I have opted my kids out of certain he for various reasons. I don't believe I making up work during illnesses that last more than a week.

In HS they have to live with their consequences when it comes to choosing what college they go to.

You sound like a very calm parent. I wish I was more like this. Many of my friends are tiger moms and I have developed anxiety over school and pushing them enough. I'm trying as the New Year began to be more relaxed about school and grades and making sure my kids enjoy childhood... but it's hard in my neighborhood....

Anonymous wrote:Curious as to whether those who are allowing kids to skip homework also were allowed to skip homework by their own parents.

I didn't have homework til 6th grade. So it was very different.

Our HHI is about $275k. Attorney and journalist. We set aside homework time and son does it most of the time, but I've told him not to do certain things I find detrimental. Like a mandatory timed math program on the computer. It caused him too much anxiety and that's insane in first grade. We found an alternative.

Both parents have graduate degrees: DH has a PhD and I have a a MS.

We do not agree with assigning homework in early elementary years. Around third grade homework is more appropriate. Why should children whose parents are providing a highly enriched home environment not be able to take advantage of that? After school is time for practicing their instrument, taking swimming lessons, reading, cooking together, talking, being with friends, or playing sports. The school has my child for most of the day, when they come home they are mine. If we want to hit a museum or take a hike we will. We do our own math and language arts enrichment at home.

That said, I agree that it is important to teach children to respect their teacher. I am not promoting defiance or a poor work ethic. We have selected a school that shares our values. Our school does not assign homework in the early grades and the students come from educated families.

Probably lower middle class for the DC area, business degree/govt worker living abroad. Homework is a must as is reading every night. I believe it's about discipline. There are sexy aspects of my job, but also some mundane, routine things and I still have to do them. DC is in K and hates doing her handwriting homework, yet her penmanship has drastically improved.

HHI around 200K. JD and PhD. Young elementary kids don't have to do more than a few minutes of homework, if that.

My parents were totally uninvolved in my homework - but I never got assigned homework until late elementary/jr high.

Neither DH nor I believe that there is much value in homework for young elementary kids, nor are we worried that we are teaching disrespect or whatever.

Hhi $300k. Kids do some homework, but not if we are doing something else or on vacation.

Curious as to whether those who are allowing kids to skip homework also were allowed to skip homework by their own parents.

HHI $300K+ ; DH and I both have advanced degrees in business/engineering. No more than 5 minutes of homework/night in elementary school. Everybody reads. If we've got something else planned that night or the kids are sick, no homework.

HHI $250

Degree in Math, work in IT.
H degree in finance, master in SW... Work in SW.

I tell my kids grade don't matter until HS. That have to give a best effort ... No more that 3 hrs of hw in middle school. No more than 1.5 hrs before that.

I have opted my kids out of certain he for various reasons. I don't believe I making up work during illnesses that last more than a week.

In HS they have to live with their consequences when it comes to choosing what college they go to.

There is a thread about people who disagree with having their kids complete homework. I am not the OP of that thread but was wondering how this breaks down by SES and occupation.

I'll go first. My kids must complete their homework religiously even when I think it is useless. We tell my kids it is their job. We are upper middle class with occupations in engineering/ accounting.