Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Actually, I should clarify: I already asked, but in a casual way. She had offered me the dining room table (also in her basement) which I turned down. Then I noticed the sideboard and said, "Are you giving that away too?" and she said no. So if I ask, it will likely be seen as pressing the issue. For what it's worth, my sister and I have a pretty prickly relationship. Sigh.

OK. So you know the answer, she's not going to be handing that over. But is it all a set? Would she maybe relent if you now accepted the table and then pleaded the case that the set should remain together?

OP, just so there is no misunderstanding, I would ask again, but this time make it clear that you would like to have it. If your sister says no again, then you should drop it.

I have no interest in anything in my mom's house or my MIL's. DH and both have siblings and they are welcome to it. We like our house sparsely furnished and I can't stand having bunch of old crap in the way of the vacuum.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'd bet money that the sideboard doesn't move from the basement in the next decade, but regardless just writing this thread helps me realize that I can live w/o the sideboard.

She probably wants the sideboard for storage. So even though you think it's just being neglected, she is getting utility out of it. Sucks, but if you can live without it, I wouldn't press the issue

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'd bet money that the sideboard doesn't move from the basement in the next decade, but regardless just writing this thread helps me realize that I can live w/o the sideboard.

Is your mom still alive to adjudicate this?

OP here. I'd bet money that the sideboard doesn't move from the basement in the next decade, but regardless just writing this thread helps me realize that I can live w/o the sideboard.

Just because the house is fully furnished doesn't mean she doesn't have plans for it. Hence why she said no.

I'd just let her know you love it and if she changes her mind you would love to have it in your home. Take the table now though, because if you don't, then later she'll say she doesn't want to break up the set.

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Actually, I should clarify: I already asked, but in a casual way. She had offered me the dining room table (also in her basement) which I turned down. Then I noticed the sideboard and said, "Are you giving that away too?" and she said no. So if I ask, it will likely be seen as pressing the issue. For what it's worth, my sister and I have a pretty prickly relationship. Sigh.

You asked once, she said no. Mentioning the issue again *WILL* be pressing the issue. You didn't mention in the OP that you had already been asked and denied. In this situation, you move on and find something else. You can revisit the issue again in the future (at least a year away) and then try to ask nicely.

You don't know if she already has plans around that. For example, although she is moving into her bf's fully furnished house, she might want to try to move that into the dininr room after she's there a while. Or she may have another room that she is thinking of redocorating and may want to use the piece.

Sorry Op, it looks like she is standing her ground with the sideboard. Any chance you want the dining room table or any other furniture that your mom has?

Now would be the time to pick something of your moms since Sister Sally has the table and the buffet.
Did you get anything from grandma ?

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Actually, I should clarify: I already asked, but in a casual way. She had offered me the dining room table (also in her basement) which I turned down. Then I noticed the sideboard and said, "Are you giving that away too?" and she said no. So if I ask, it will likely be seen as pressing the issue. For what it's worth, my sister and I have a pretty prickly relationship. Sigh.

So you already asked and she said "no". If the furniture was given to her, unless she was planning to get rid of it, why would you now have claim to taking it from her?

Drop it. She already said she doesn't want to give it away. This is not something to get into a family feud over.

OP here.

Actually, I should clarify: I already asked, but in a casual way. She had offered me the dining room table (also in her basement) which I turned down. Then I noticed the sideboard and said, "Are you giving that away too?" and she said no. So if I ask, it will likely be seen as pressing the issue. For what it's worth, my sister and I have a pretty prickly relationship. Sigh.

I have a good relationship with my siblings, so I can't imagine not asking. Just be polite about it. Don't act entitled to have it; but just say that you notice that she is only using the piece for storage and you would love to have it for your dining room and would she mind letting you use it in your dining room. You can offer to return it if she decides to put it in her dining room at a later time.

Go ahead and ask. I'm also the oldest and have a ton of my parents' furniture. I would be happy to give something to my little sister, particularly if I didn't need it!

I'm the youngest sibling, and lived in an apartment for a long time. During those years, one of my sisters took my mother's dining room furniture, which was being stored in my parents' basement. Flash forward a few years: I now have a house and my sister just moved into her fiance's fully furnished home. My grandmother's sideboard is in their finished basement, working storage duty. Would it be in appropriate for me to ask if I could have it to put in my dining room?