Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently tried and failed to find a research program that would accept our blastocysts. We picked up the straws and I held them, let them defrost, burned some incense, and cried. I don't think they're babies, but it represents the end of possibility (we have one child). Very difficult, but I feel some relief now that the decision is made, and it'll be good not to be paying for it any more.

How beautiful.

I honestly can't tell if you're being sarcastic.

Anonymous wrote:I recently tried and failed to find a research program that would accept our blastocysts. We picked up the straws and I held them, let them defrost, burned some incense, and cried. I don't think they're babies, but it represents the end of possibility (we have one child). Very difficult, but I feel some relief now that the decision is made, and it'll be good not to be paying for it any more.

How beautiful.

paid for about 3 years of storage before signing them over for research. Friend had a rule of thumb, if you're 1000% sure you are not going to have any more kids and are too tired and old to even think about the possibility, time to sign them off. It's interesting how hard I found it to do, given everything we went through.

We had one normal embryo on ice. I stored it for a year and then filled out the form to have it destroyed. There was no option offered to donate it to research by my clinic and I called and asked about it but then didn't pursue it beyond that.

I did not struggle with the decision of whether to use it for our family (we are done) and my DH was not open to the idea of embryo donation (I was AMA, so I'm not sure anyone would have wanted it anyway). But it did feel like the end of an era and I held on to the form for about a week before getting it notarized and sent in. This is probably a bit twisted, but I also ran through the scenario in my mind - what if something happens to one of our kids and we want another? But I had to be realistic with myself and admit that if something tragic happened, I don't think we would even use the embryo in that scenario. We're old-ish. We're done.

Good luck OP.

Curious to read the responses. I'm in the same boat - pregnant with #2 right now after IVF worked on the very first cycle (have a naturally conceived DC1), and have nine embryos on ice. Realistically, the most we'd use would be one for DC3, and certainly no more, and maybe not even that since I'm 41 now, and having a child at 43 is no picnic...donating to research would be ideal.

I'm there too. And I have no answers for you. I can only commiserate. Never in a million years did I think IVF would work on the first try, so I certainly wanted whatever was not implanted to be frozen. So we have one AA day five embryo on ice.
I think we're good with two kids. Time, money and age keep me from going for 3, but that one embryo on ice kind of haunts me because technically I certainly *could* go for it. There are plenty of 39 year old working mothers of three out there. But I don't think it's the right decision for our family. So I too wonder how long I'll keep throwing away the $600/year!

I recently tried and failed to find a research program that would accept our blastocysts. We picked up the straws and I held them, let them defrost, burned some incense, and cried. I don't think they're babies, but it represents the end of possibility (we have one child). Very difficult, but I feel some relief now that the decision is made, and it'll be good not to be paying for it any more.

Anonymous wrote:Curious? what is the cost range

$1800 to freeze. About $600 a year for storage. $1500 to thaw.
Some insurance companies pay for it, with deductible and copay, of course.

I think you can donate them for "research". This pretty much means the clinic can use them to do small experiment like optimize the cell culture media or use them to train staff.

I'm not the OP but in the same situation & paying $500/year for long term storage. I'm also AMA and doubt anyone wants my embryos.

Curious? what is the cost range

We're struggling with this as well. We only have one on ice and DH is pretty against another child - I'm neutral at this point. We've considered doing an FET but not doing anything that seemed to work on our prior cycles - bedrest, cutting caffeine, not exercising - and if it happens, it happens. That might not work for four, though.

We were in the same boat as you- twins who are now 5. We let our others defrost. Never thought about it again. They are just cells, at least to me at this stage.

It's a tough one and I'm not sure you'll find an answer here since many of us are hoping to get embryos. However going into IVF we felt strongly about not wanting to have extras so we did natural cycle, and it worked for our DS (now 3) but it looks like we need to do stim IVF for a sibling. My cycle has become irregular so trying NC doesn't make sense, and I don't know how I will respond to the meds, but our RE said we could freeze eggs if I did not want to deal with the issue you raised. So many options and decisions it's mind blowing!

We had 8 eggs retrieved, six embryos created and two "healthiest" implanted resulting in twins.

We are in our early 40's and feel like we are done. I assumed that it would take several cycles before an implant took, and now I have mixed feelings about the stored embryos. We are paying $$$ a month and can't keep doing this forever.