OP, has anyone taken your MIL to a doctor to see if she has a urinary tract infection? There are very few symptoms in an older person, but incontinence is one of them.

Anonymous wrote:If you can private pay for a few months, easy. Direct without hospitalization doable but hard. I did it about 9 months ago. Dealing with medicaid is a nightmare which is why few nursing homes will take the risk before approval. But, you cannot get medicaid without being in a nursing home so it is a loophole.

She can private pay for maybe as many as six months. Should SIL take her to the ER?

If you can private pay for a few months, easy. Direct without hospitalization doable but hard. I did it about 9 months ago. Dealing with medicaid is a nightmare which is why few nursing homes will take the risk before approval. But, you cannot get medicaid without being in a nursing home so it is a loophole.

SIL just called to say she found mom/MIL basically incontinent at her home. This has been trending but now seems like she is basically unable to remember to go to bathroom. Am not confident any meds will change her situation as she won't be able to remember to take them. FIL passed a year ago and MIL's cognition deteriorating. Unfortunately she also has a difficult personality to boot. She has limited savings and rents. What are the chances of private paying at a nursing home and moving her over to Medicaid? SIL cannot take her in as she and hubby work opposite shifts and already care for SN child. They have been saints.