Anonymous
12/09/2014 14:40
Subject: S/O gracious host/ gracious guest
I don't know of any guests that go to your house trying to "sucker" you into the impossible.
Anonymous
12/09/2014 14:39
Subject: S/O gracious host/ gracious guest
In reality, when hosting, I find that food issues are very easy to accommodate. Most people take the stance that they can eat anything when they're a guest in some one's home. Some of my friends have actual food issues and we accommodate them without a problem - dairy, gluten, allergies, vegetarian, etc. Perhaps it's because we're an international couple and have a wide range of dishes we can make between the two of us, but I just don't find it to be that big a deal.
The people who truly can't eat much of anything usually bring their own food - my SIL's sister is on some raw food, all organic, vegan kick with categories of vegetables that are also excluded for I don't know what reason. She comes to our holidays, picks the few items she can eat of what we've made, eats plenty of whatever dish she's brought to the party, and seems happy about it. We don't consider her rude and she doesn't seem to think ill of us either.
But here on DCUM, or in theory, if you list out all the possible food issues a set of guests might have, it sounds impossible. I just don't find that to be the case. Most of the time, you can accommodate your guests and when it's not possible, the guests know that and they take care of themselves.
The people who truly can't eat much of anything usually bring their own food - my SIL's sister is on some raw food, all organic, vegan kick with categories of vegetables that are also excluded for I don't know what reason. She comes to our holidays, picks the few items she can eat of what we've made, eats plenty of whatever dish she's brought to the party, and seems happy about it. We don't consider her rude and she doesn't seem to think ill of us either.
But here on DCUM, or in theory, if you list out all the possible food issues a set of guests might have, it sounds impossible. I just don't find that to be the case. Most of the time, you can accommodate your guests and when it's not possible, the guests know that and they take care of themselves.
Anonymous
12/09/2014 13:28
Subject: S/O gracious host/ gracious guest
Why is this in "Family Relationships"?
Anonymous
12/09/2014 09:28
Subject: S/O gracious host/ gracious guest
the "Bring your own good" thread seems to have split into a lesson on vegetarianism and a discussion on host vs. guest.
I think a gracious host makes reasonable accommodations for their guests in order to make them feel welcome. I also think it's very rude and presumptuous of a guest to give the host a laundry list of preferences that "should" be followed. Whilst I understand the need to accommodate allergies, medical conditions, etc., the modern day dietary "landscape" is almost prohibitive for some hosts to follow, especially when picky palates need to be taken into consideration.
My usual "policy" is to ensure I accommodate medical conditions like celiac disease, allergies, and intolerances. Depending on the size of the group, I try to accommodate taste preferences, but sometimes majority wins. I usually work around specifics if I am hosting he guest in question one on one. Much like the OP in the "bring" thread, if there is an entire family with a large list of "needs", I'll ask them to bring something.
As a guest, I usually try to bring a dish I can eat (I'm severely lactose intolerant to the point I can't take certain a medications). If the dish I'm bringing isn't welcome, I just eat what I can eat, and bring a snack in my purse.
Just wondering what the norm is? I try to accommodate as much as possible, but I find some guests make it nearly impossible to make a dish or two to serve. Because they are used to making 6 different meals in their household, it's not always desirable for me as a host to do it in mine.
Where does he line between being gracious and being a sucker get drawn?
I think a gracious host makes reasonable accommodations for their guests in order to make them feel welcome. I also think it's very rude and presumptuous of a guest to give the host a laundry list of preferences that "should" be followed. Whilst I understand the need to accommodate allergies, medical conditions, etc., the modern day dietary "landscape" is almost prohibitive for some hosts to follow, especially when picky palates need to be taken into consideration.
My usual "policy" is to ensure I accommodate medical conditions like celiac disease, allergies, and intolerances. Depending on the size of the group, I try to accommodate taste preferences, but sometimes majority wins. I usually work around specifics if I am hosting he guest in question one on one. Much like the OP in the "bring" thread, if there is an entire family with a large list of "needs", I'll ask them to bring something.
As a guest, I usually try to bring a dish I can eat (I'm severely lactose intolerant to the point I can't take certain a medications). If the dish I'm bringing isn't welcome, I just eat what I can eat, and bring a snack in my purse.
Just wondering what the norm is? I try to accommodate as much as possible, but I find some guests make it nearly impossible to make a dish or two to serve. Because they are used to making 6 different meals in their household, it's not always desirable for me as a host to do it in mine.
Where does he line between being gracious and being a sucker get drawn?