Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"is it rude if they don't answer or call back?"

How is it rude if they don't ANSWER, OP? LOL

Lol. Sorry! Not what i really meant to say. I guess it just feels irksome if I take the time out of my day to pick up the phone and say Happy Birthday and they don't acknowledge it. Or is that the status quo now?

Hmmm...if you are irked because all the effort you put into placing that 30 second phone call while you walked to the metro wasn't fully appreciated and acknowledged then maybe there are other reasons you aren't being called back?

Give freely without expectation. If your "best friend" doesn't call you for three mos, irrespective of any bday msg, it's a sign that she's not that close. Friends know how to give and take without getting bitter about it.

Anonymous wrote:I think it's assumed you don't need to call back to happy birthday calls.

Right? It's not like you asked them a question and needed an answer. You wanted to send them good wishes on their birthday; you did. Communication successful! Do you expect a thank-you note for a birthday card, too? It's certainly nice if someone calls you back, because presumably you like this person and would enjoy talking to them, but maybe they were busy--at work, doing stuff around the house, or, I don't know, out celebrating their birthday? If I am close enough to someone that I make the effort to call them on their birthday, I would imagine it's someone I talk to fairly regularly, and I wouldn't expect a special phone call just to acknowledge my message.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I called my best friend to wish her happy birthday and it took her THREE MONTHS to call me back. We are in our 40s. She made a very clear statement that we were no longer close so I have acted accordingly since then.

Oh man, friends like you when I'm in my 40s are such a drain of my life's blood. The call back for the Happy Birthday is onerous; it's like a thank you note for something you never asked for. People are busy--it doesn't mean they're not your friend. GROW UP. It's not 1970 any more; people have shit to do.

Anonymous wrote:Really--this is why I HATE phone calls. People who make them always want some pound of flesh from you--it's like they're trying to extract something from you. TEXT ME, BYE

OP here. Understandable but if this is a friend you regularly talk to on the phone? She obviously doesn't hate talking on the phone.

I think it's assumed you don't need to call back to happy birthday calls.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I called my best friend to wish her happy birthday and it took her THREE MONTHS to call me back. We are in our 40s. She made a very clear statement that we were no longer close so I have acted accordingly since then.

I know how you feel. Same thing happened to me. Sorry, but silence speaks volumes sometimes.

Really--this is why I HATE phone calls. People who make them always want some pound of flesh from you--it's like they're trying to extract something from you. TEXT ME, BYE

Yes. I called my best friend to wish her happy birthday and it took her THREE MONTHS to call me back. We are in our 40s. She made a very clear statement that we were no longer close so I have acted accordingly since then.

Say it because you want to say it, not because you want to receive a response. Is it about you or them?

Geez -- don't call then you won't have to spend your time irritating the f** out of the rest of the world because no one responded to you right away.

Anonymous wrote:"is it rude if they don't answer or call back?"

How is it rude if they don't ANSWER, OP? LOL

Lol. Sorry! Not what i really meant to say. I guess it just feels irksome if I take the time out of my day to pick up the phone and say Happy Birthday and they don't acknowledge it. Or is that the status quo now?

Eh? It's not rude to not answer your phone. Maybe they were busy. Maybe a thousand things.

I don't think this is something to get butthurt over. Maybe if I said happy birthday to someone when we were standing face-to-face and they just starred at me, then I'd get offended.

But you called to deliver a message of happy birthday. And presumably you did. Then it's over.

"is it rude if they don't answer or call back?"

How is it rude if they don't ANSWER, OP? LOL

In this day and age, I think many of us save the actual Happy Birthday phone call to the people in our lives we're closer to. Otherwise, a Facebook or text may be appropriate. However, if you take the time out to call and wish someone Happy Birthday is it rude if they don't answer or call back?