Anonymous wrote:OP here-

I particularly was peeved when he repeatedly said no to the +1 for 10 months and then sprung this on us 1 month out.

Ok bitch.

Stop it with the bridezilla please. Its offensive. I get where OP is coming from. Its a destination wedding on her dime, and the plus 1s were obviously extended as a courtesy if they were actually romantically involved with someone. I'm torn on what I'd do. You said he could bring someone and didn't specify who, BUT this woman has no connection to you or to your family and is just taking the opportunity for a vacation. I'd be annoyed for sure.

Anonymous wrote:Ok Bridezlla. You said +1 without limitations. Now you are upset?

Reminds me of my bridezilla friend whose wedding I was in recently. Extended a plus one to everyone and then bitched and complained that a single bridesmaid was bringing one of her good guy friends. She had a head table that included the guests of the wedding party. She decided that since she didn't know this bridesmaid's date, he couldn't sit at the head table and stuck him with a group of people he didn't know (even though he knew people at another table but she claimed it didn't flow). Needless to say, her friendship is pretty strained with a lot of us.

OP here-

I particularly was peeved when he repeatedly said no to the +1 for 10 months and then sprung this on us 1 month out.

I agree with others, you said he could bring a +1. If you had certain criteria the +1 had to meet you should have mentioned that with the invitation. Please don't tell him now he can't bring the girl, that would be really shitty!

You told him he could bring one, it would be rude to now say he can't because his +1 doesn't make your preferred list. Not to mention that for a destination wedding, they very likely have already made travel plans and may incur cancellation fees if you say she can't come. Are you prepared to reimburse her for that?

Also, you're having a destination wedding. For the love of all that is decent, if you're going to make him spend $$ and PTO for your "dream," at least let him bring along someone he'll have fun spending time with.

You didn't say"+1 but only if you are serious, and romantically involved enough in my judgement that I feel like paying for her."

Destination weddings have all this kind of stuff wrapped around it. You should not be having one if you don't want to pay for it as you first imagined you would.

i would find this annoying too. i have always interpreted a +1 to be a date to a wedding, not bringing a buddy just for the hell of it.

You sound like a bitch.

Who makes family attend and expensive destination wedding, tells them they can bring a date, then gets mad at them for actually bringing a date?

A plus one means bring whoever you want. I was recently married and my brother plus several friends brought just a friend as a plus one.

Slow down bridezilla.

Why do you care? He wants a date, and he's your own brother for crying out loud.

Ok Bridezlla. You said +1 without limitations. Now you are upset?

You said he could bring a +1. Don't say it if you don't mean it.

You said he could have a +1 now he does. You didn't say it had to be a +1 that gave him blow jobs.

Would like to get thoughts and opinions on this scenario:

-Planning our wedding and both my sibs are single.
-I told each as soon as wedding planning started that they could have a +1. I figured that over the course of a year of planning, maybe they would start dating someone and would like to bring as a guest.
-My sister declined immediately because she didn't want to bring someone random just for the sake of bringing someone. (She is my sensible, thoughtful sib)
-Fast forward a year. 1 month before wedding, my brother sent back the rsvp card with his name and someone I had never heard of. I called to ask him who this person was, and he told me that "they met each other at his new job and they are friends." Completely platonic--in fact she has a girlfriend.

I'm completely annoyed by this. Who brings a friend just for the sake of bringing a friend? This is a destination wedding and I find it obnoxious to have to pay for someone neither I nor my fiance have ever met, AND isn't romantically involved with my brother. Thoughts??