Anonymous wrote:You're kidding, right?

You know, if all goes well someday you too may be a MIL. Are you preparing for your child's spouse to hate you just because that is how it is?

You're kidding, right?

I still miss mine. She passed away in 2005 and DH's family has fallen apart without her. I loved going to her home for holidays. So pleasant, I felt like I could relax and wasn't being judged. She had five boys and loved her two DILs. Didn't have anything to prove to anyone. Loved couponing and shopping, loved a deal. Just a sweet, sweet lady, had a huge funeral and I cried buckets.

Anonymous wrote:
Oh, this is timely! Please spare a kind thought or prayer for my beloved MIL!

She is on a waiting list in another country for a pacemaker.
It can't come too soon, because she is failing fast.

She escaped the Vietnam War and single-handedly, while pregnant with her 4th child, brought her three young children to safety. They arrived to their refuge country just with the clothes on their backs, and she slowly built up a real estate business that paid for all of their education and more. Her four sons were raised so well, and thanks to her are successful, happy people. She has been a tower of peaceful, quiet strength.

And she has always been charming yet non-interventionist with me!

That's a strong woman! Fingers crossed for her.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for sharing, OP. It's nice to hear the positive experiences. Can we extend this to SILs, or all ILs in general?

Yes, please do!

-OP

Oh, this is timely! Please spare a kind thought or prayer for my beloved MIL!

She is on a waiting list in another country for a pacemaker.
It can't come too soon, because she is failing fast.

She escaped the Vietnam War and single-handedly, while pregnant with her 4th child, brought her three young children to safety. They arrived to their refuge country just with the clothes on their backs, and she slowly built up a real estate business that paid for all of their education and more. Her four sons were raised so well, and thanks to her are successful, happy people. She has been a tower of peaceful, quiet strength.

And she has always been charming yet non-interventionist with me!

Mil and fil are both awesome. Of course DH is awesome too so no complaints there. Traffic in Tyson's corner, otoh...

I love mine, and my FIL too. Actually the whole family is pretty great. They live 5 minutes away yet we don't feel too pressured to see them all the time. They help watch our dogs when we're out of town, babysit DS both during the day (FIL is retired) and for date night, and FIL even came over to do yard work. MIL is easy to talk to (sadly easier than talking to my own mom at times) and fun to be around. She is so so good with DS and does lots of grungy little boys things with him that I find icky. She also buys really nice, tasteful presents for me (some of my favorite jewelry is from her).

She passed away well before I met DH so of course she is a saint.

FIL's second wife is a real piece of work though.

Mine is the shit. She came and stayed for more than a week after our son was born. Catered to me hand and foot. Grocery shopped, cooked and cleaned up after every meal, made sure we both slept, cleaned my apartment floor to ceiling, gave us a night out on our own, didn't offer unsolicited advice, etc etc. We just returned from vacation late last night and she delivered milk, OJ, fruit and donuts to our house last night so we'd have something to eat this morning. Just two examples of the way she is so totally thoughtful all the time. I go to her for advice before my own mother and she is a role model. I will devastated when she passes away, though hopefully we have at LEAST 20 years before that happens.

Mine is fabulous. So is my father in law. They live across the country and any time I'm traveling for work near them, they offer to watch the babies if I bring them.

They begged me to set up an amazon wish list for them so when they want to buy the babies something they can buy useful things we want them to have. They are not passive aggressive at all, and are supportive of they ways dh and I choose to raise our kids even when it's different from what they did as parents.

When we go to visit they stock up on our brand of diapers and wipes so we don't have to run around buying more than is needed for the plane ride. They're just always so helpful and supportive, in every way.

Mine is decent too. In the beginning of our marriage she was heart broken we left the Catholic church but she overcame her disappointment in order to have a loving relationship with us. I look back on it and realize how hard that was for her and really appreciate her selflessness. This year my oldest was in 2nd grade and that is typically the time kids make their first communion and I knew it was hard for her to see DD not have a big celebration but she NEVER said a thing about it to me. She really does put us and my kids first.

* crickets*

Thanks for sharing, OP. It's nice to hear the positive experiences. Can we extend this to SILs, or all ILs in general?

All these badly behaved MIL stories makes me wonder: who has a kind, generous, loving MIL?

I do! She is generous with her time and talents, and is an awesome grandmother. She recently came and re-landscaped my flower beds just because she loves to garden and I have a brown thumb. She reorganized the kids' playroom when she came to meet my third DS just because she saw it needed some work, and it gave her a chance to interact and play with the two older DS. She is not judgmental of the parenting choices DH and I make (or if she is, she keeps her mouth shut!), supports our decisions and is genuinely happy for our family. She raised an awesome son (my DH) and I truly hope to be as wonderful a MIL someday to my sons' spouses.

Anyone else?