Anonymous wrote:met someone recently i've seen three times now. still deciding what i think. odd that i find a lot of online cites of him back in the early 2000s while he was in grad school and then in dc for a few years but then nothing. have had a hard time getting the recent employment stuff straight…not that i care so much what his work is, just that it all seems hazy to me. says he's working from home now consulting so that may be it but still odd.

suspect i should pay attention to my gut uneasiness. but he is nice in a lot of ways…don't want to prejudge.

So why don't you just ask him? Tell him that you've been having a hard time getting the recent employment stuff straight, and see what he says. If it sounds suspicious coming out of his mouth, then drop him.

You should run, OP. You should run as fast as you can so this man has plenty of breathing room.

Yikes...I'm sooo glad I'm married.

I was on the market between marriages for about ten years though and yes, I did a cursory google of my dates (and most of them admitted doing the same with me), but there was NOTHING like this - no "explain these empty periods in your record please"!

WTF? That's like an employer saying "gee, what's up with these employment gaps". NFW. Anybody this paranoid and nosy is somebody I'd just as soon not date, TYVM.

Some of us - those of us where were on the internet in the late 80s and posting on usenet realized maybe we didn't want to leave such a permanent trail, and started to trim down our 'online presence'.

i google everyone, nothing wrong with that. I google tenants, or people where money exchanges hands. I do pretty thorough searches of their references too. And I'm a SAHM.
Also, I would google someone's linkedin profile. Everything is done online these days and nothing wrong with looking into it.

I think there's 3 references to me on-line, and one is from 2008. That's probably the most recent, in fact.

Anonymous wrote:
"No I'm not stalking him..."

Checking up on people you are sleeping with or dating is smart. Good for OP.

OP, did you check the prison records from the state's where he lived? Also you can do a really easy address and public records check at Intelius.com

I did it on a friend's fiance and found out that he had never divorced his first wife. He was a pathological liar and just seemed off to me, so I DIY skip traced him.

I've paid for background checks if I couldn't get a solid firsthand vett of a date. Try that.

Anonymous wrote:I have never heard of anyone going online to try and track down someone else's history. If you were a future employer I'd get it but...ehm...I am speechless XD

I think most people google a potential date, especially someone you meet on line.

I have never heard of anyone going online to try and track down someone else's history. If you were a future employer I'd get it but...ehm...I am speechless XD

Anonymous wrote:
"No I'm not stalking him..."

OP: I'm not stalking. Just went on line as I was starting to get a gut feeling something was off in the history. I think I'll just ask directly next time I see him and see what I think. Thanks all.

"No I'm not stalking him..."

Lots of perfectly reasonable explanations for why you might not be finding more. But - trust your gut.

That's my first rule. If your gut is uneasy then be very cautious.

A lot of government work around these parts could create "haziness"... or lack of online footprints. This can also explain overall vagueness and non-specific descriptions.

Or, he's a lazy bum who is trying to rope you in.

there is very little about me since grad school except for a couple of races I've run. Why? Because I work for a large company that doesn't post about their employees, and I prefer less of an online presence. There is nothing suspect about that.

met someone recently i've seen three times now. still deciding what i think. odd that i find a lot of online cites of him back in the early 2000s while he was in grad school and then in dc for a few years but then nothing. have had a hard time getting the recent employment stuff straight…not that i care so much what his work is, just that it all seems hazy to me. says he's working from home now consulting so that may be it but still odd.

suspect i should pay attention to my gut uneasiness. but he is nice in a lot of ways…don't want to prejudge.