Ask her to help you with the housework in a way that has you both in conversation. Like help you fold the laundry or weed the yard or something. It might take you more time, but if you do it together, you'll get work done, spend time with DD, and help her learn how to do those things on her own. I really wished my parents did that for me. More mopping floors and oil changes!

Anonymous wrote:Your kid wants to be with you. That's a gift. Take it.

Anonymous wrote:Awww I feel bad for your daughter. I don't think you meant any harm, at all, but if a 17 year old wants to do something with his/ her mother, jump on it.

+1

Take her up on hanging out with her - make or find the time. Then go to lunch/coffee/dinner afterwards, and put away your phone.

Sounds like she feels rejected. I wouldn't be trying to figure out who's right or wrong here. I think your 17yo dd wanting to spend time with you is a really good thing and you should run with it. Maybe have a weekly plan so she knows your committed.

Well...I suppose at your funeral your daughter can always talk about how she grew up in a clean house vs with a mom who could be bothered to carve out an hour or two a week to spend time with her.

Your priorities are so screwed up

I think the title of your thread is very telling. You are asking if your daughter was wrong for being hurt and upset that it appears her mom can't make any time to play tennis with her?

Hope that once your daughter is off to college and has her own life and no longer wants to hang out with you, you aren't sitting there regretting the fact that you can't take an hour or two out of your life to spend quality time with your kid.

Your kid wants to be with you. That's a gift. Take it.

Let the housework slide a bit and go play tennis with her. She's 17. Soon she'll be too busy for you...

Maybe your delivery was wrong. Tell her that every Tuesday you'll play with her for two hours starting at 5pm so she knows she's got you locked in. Your kid wants to spend time with you and you rebuffed her. Ouch.

Did you suggest this in the sense of "On Friday I am busy so maybe you can play with Larla instead" or did you suggest this in the sense of "From now on I think you need to find another tennis partner"? If it was the first sense, then fine, she's just being a drama queen. If it was the latter, then OP, I think you owe her an apology because that's just mean and as others have said, why wouldn't you invest in this time with her and make it a priority?

Awww I feel bad for your daughter. I don't think you meant any harm, at all, but if a 17 year old wants to do something with his/ her mother, jump on it.

I think you likely hurt her feelings.

Not inappropriate at all. It sounds like your daughter just maybe wants to spend more time with you and to know you're there for her. It's not about the tennis, it's about your relationship with your daughter. I think it's nice that she wants to have that closeness with you.

It's not inappropriate, but it hurt her feelings. I'm guessing she suggested tennis because she wanted to spend time with you, not because she really wanted to play.

Dd is 17. We often play tennis together and she's always asking me to play, but of course, I am busy with a job, housework, etc. so I have limited times that I can play with her...so, I suggested she find a friend or teammate or someone her age to hit with. And she was angered by this, saying I just don't want to spend time with her, don't care, etc...was my suggestion really that inappropriate?