Anonymous wrote:Not telling your kid the story of their history is a huge omission. They may need to know for medical reasons down the line, or find out in that way. Wouldn't it be easier to make that a part of their story? Don't start your parenting relationship with a lie.

I don't think you read the question properly... I don't see anyone asking the opinion about what to tell to kid about donor sperm. Question is about AI ... Thanks for your unnecessary opinion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

I think the cost was about $600 per vial of IUI identity release sperm plus $150-200 for shipping (special liquid nitrogen cannister). Access to all info on donors cost us about $150? This was all about 3 years ago, so my memory is a little fuzzy. You can check their current prices online easily and browse donors. You and your husband should look into how you're going to handle telling your kid (it's very hard to keep this a secret forever, especially when kids study genetics in high school) and whether you want to do an identy relsease donor. The main reason we picked California Cryobank was that they had the largest selection of identity release donors, but if that's not important to you, there are a lot of other banks. Fairfax Cryobank is in this area, so you might be able to save on shipping costs.

I wonder what Shady Grove charged you. Donor info ( $ ) is available but IUI costs never are openly shown on the sites. Funny in Europe they can show all costs on the web site (with all possible scenarios but in USA they dont do that.

We mainly I decided we are going to go with anonym. donor. I personally do not want to share our story with anyone in the family. Nobody knows about this and we decided to keep it. If we were open to open identy donor, I would go to my friend(s) for fresh sperm. We have at least 2 friends who have an awesome personality and are dying to have kids . One of them is single and he lost his hopes that he will ever will meet his special one so he is really asking if we would use him at least he will have continuation of his family... the other friend's girl friend is not open him having a baby with us she already has a kid, but he does not and he wants to have a kid but she refuses to give birth ever again. Funny how life sometimes ironic those who want can't have those who don't want have (some or plenty)


OK looking forward for more info, hopefully from those who used other places/clinics. Congrats again!

PP here. If you've been discussing this with your friends someone will eventually slip up and tell your child, or your child will figure it out when they have a unit in biology about recessive/dominant traits and something doesn't quite line up between the child and dear old dad. The identity release donors don't have any role in the kid's life (unlike the what you're thinking about regarding your friends), the kid just has the option to contact him when they turn 18.

IUI costs will vary greatly depending on whether insurance will cover any of it.

The friends I have mentioned are oversees and they see me when I travel to my Homeland so technially we have a control if they will see the kid or not... So still stays as the secret

Plus we always can lie that it was a miracle...

So you have friends that are so great you would ask them for sperm? But now that you're using donor sperm, you'll keep them out of your kid's life to keep your lie in check?

I'm getting a huge immature vibe. Maybe it's the emoticons. Or the euphemism for the word vagina. Or the desire to hide your child's genetic make up.

Your kid will find out. Eventually:
1. Someone will tell him since you are discussing it with the homeland.
2. A medical condition will reveal itself that makes accurate medical history a priority
3. Your kid will have a trait that is impossible coming from your husband

And then the child will feel betrayed and lied to for decades. Also the irresponsibility of keeping a huge part of his medical history a secret boggles my mind.

Fwiw, known sperm donor. Home insemination. Pos after first try.

Not telling your kid the story of their history is a huge omission. They may need to know for medical reasons down the line, or find out in that way. Wouldn't it be easier to make that a part of their story? Don't start your parenting relationship with a lie.

Anonymous wrote:We used donor sperm from Fairfax Cyrobank. I read up on several guys, and picked from those with the best medical histories. Did IUI. However, we also found out in the course of it all that I too had infertility issues, so I had to have surgery before the IUI.

I did not use meds, since my problem was tubal and I didn't want to increase the risk of multiples.

IUI worked the first time we tried it. It cost several thousand including buying several vials of sperm and my surgery, but of course very worth it!

I recommend buying up a lot of the donor sperm in case you decide to have more than one child. We were left with just one vial after several attempts at kid#2 (and the guy was no longer donating), so ended up doing one IVF with that last vial to increase our chances to get a full biological sibling. Luckily, it worked.

Wow Congrats mama I am noting your advice Thank you for sharing your story!

We used donor sperm from Fairfax Cyrobank. I read up on several guys, and picked from those with the best medical histories. Did IUI. However, we also found out in the course of it all that I too had infertility issues, so I had to have surgery before the IUI.

I did not use meds, since my problem was tubal and I didn't want to increase the risk of multiples.

IUI worked the first time we tried it. It cost several thousand including buying several vials of sperm and my surgery, but of course very worth it!

I recommend buying up a lot of the donor sperm in case you decide to have more than one child. We were left with just one vial after several attempts at kid#2 (and the guy was no longer donating), so ended up doing one IVF with that last vial to increase our chances to get a full biological sibling. Luckily, it worked.

Anonymous wrote:I'm not in your position yet, but I think it's not right to keep something like this from a child (when they are old enough to understand). They should know how they came to be - you should tell him/her you used donor sperm.

Hmm... Not sure yet. leaning more not to tell... I don't see a point. I think this way: for example i have a steady life right now. Have all I need, thanks God. Now if somebody comes up to me and says I was born from a donor sperm or egg bluh bluh bluh I would feel strange... maybe even upset... I think my mentality is different. so I think it is better off to keep it in secret... we are not plannig to include donor's life/opinion into our life etc. why change that later? we actually do not want him to be a part of our life... call me a selfish

I'm not in your position yet, but I think it's not right to keep something like this from a child (when they are old enough to understand). They should know how they came to be - you should tell him/her you used donor sperm.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

I think the cost was about $600 per vial of IUI identity release sperm plus $150-200 for shipping (special liquid nitrogen cannister). Access to all info on donors cost us about $150? This was all about 3 years ago, so my memory is a little fuzzy. You can check their current prices online easily and browse donors. You and your husband should look into how you're going to handle telling your kid (it's very hard to keep this a secret forever, especially when kids study genetics in high school) and whether you want to do an identy relsease donor. The main reason we picked California Cryobank was that they had the largest selection of identity release donors, but if that's not important to you, there are a lot of other banks. Fairfax Cryobank is in this area, so you might be able to save on shipping costs.

I wonder what Shady Grove charged you. Donor info ( $ ) is available but IUI costs never are openly shown on the sites. Funny in Europe they can show all costs on the web site (with all possible scenarios but in USA they dont do that.

We mainly I decided we are going to go with anonym. donor. I personally do not want to share our story with anyone in the family. Nobody knows about this and we decided to keep it. If we were open to open identy donor, I would go to my friend(s) for fresh sperm. We have at least 2 friends who have an awesome personality and are dying to have kids . One of them is single and he lost his hopes that he will ever will meet his special one so he is really asking if we would use him at least he will have continuation of his family... the other friend's girl friend is not open him having a baby with us she already has a kid, but he does not and he wants to have a kid but she refuses to give birth ever again. Funny how life sometimes ironic those who want can't have those who don't want have (some or plenty)


OK looking forward for more info, hopefully from those who used other places/clinics. Congrats again!

PP here. If you've been discussing this with your friends someone will eventually slip up and tell your child, or your child will figure it out when they have a unit in biology about recessive/dominant traits and something doesn't quite line up between the child and dear old dad. The identity release donors don't have any role in the kid's life (unlike the what you're thinking about regarding your friends), the kid just has the option to contact him when they turn 18.

IUI costs will vary greatly depending on whether insurance will cover any of it.

The friends I have mentioned are oversees and they see me when I travel to my Homeland so technially we have a control if they will see the kid or not... So still stays as the secret

Plus we always can lie that it was a miracle...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

I think the cost was about $600 per vial of IUI identity release sperm plus $150-200 for shipping (special liquid nitrogen cannister). Access to all info on donors cost us about $150? This was all about 3 years ago, so my memory is a little fuzzy. You can check their current prices online easily and browse donors. You and your husband should look into how you're going to handle telling your kid (it's very hard to keep this a secret forever, especially when kids study genetics in high school) and whether you want to do an identy relsease donor. The main reason we picked California Cryobank was that they had the largest selection of identity release donors, but if that's not important to you, there are a lot of other banks. Fairfax Cryobank is in this area, so you might be able to save on shipping costs.

I wonder what Shady Grove charged you. Donor info ( $ ) is available but IUI costs never are openly shown on the sites. Funny in Europe they can show all costs on the web site (with all possible scenarios but in USA they dont do that.

We mainly I decided we are going to go with anonym. donor. I personally do not want to share our story with anyone in the family. Nobody knows about this and we decided to keep it. If we were open to open identy donor, I would go to my friend(s) for fresh sperm. We have at least 2 friends who have an awesome personality and are dying to have kids . One of them is single and he lost his hopes that he will ever will meet his special one so he is really asking if we would use him at least he will have continuation of his family... the other friend's girl friend is not open him having a baby with us she already has a kid, but he does not and he wants to have a kid but she refuses to give birth ever again. Funny how life sometimes ironic those who want can't have those who don't want have (some or plenty)


OK looking forward for more info, hopefully from those who used other places/clinics. Congrats again!

PP here. If you've been discussing this with your friends someone will eventually slip up and tell your child, or your child will figure it out when they have a unit in biology about recessive/dominant traits and something doesn't quite line up between the child and dear old dad. The identity release donors don't have any role in the kid's life (unlike the what you're thinking about regarding your friends), the kid just has the option to contact him when they turn 18.

IUI costs will vary greatly depending on whether insurance will cover any of it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

I think the cost was about $600 per vial of IUI identity release sperm plus $150-200 for shipping (special liquid nitrogen cannister). Access to all info on donors cost us about $150? This was all about 3 years ago, so my memory is a little fuzzy. You can check their current prices online easily and browse donors. You and your husband should look into how you're going to handle telling your kid (it's very hard to keep this a secret forever, especially when kids study genetics in high school) and whether you want to do an identy relsease donor. The main reason we picked California Cryobank was that they had the largest selection of identity release donors, but if that's not important to you, there are a lot of other banks. Fairfax Cryobank is in this area, so you might be able to save on shipping costs.

I wonder what Shady Grove charged you. Donor info ( $ ) is available but IUI costs never are openly shown on the sites. Funny in Europe they can show all costs on the web site (with all possible scenarios but in USA they dont do that.

We mainly I decided we are going to go with anonym. donor. I personally do not want to share our story with anyone in the family. Nobody knows about this and we decided to keep it. If we were open to open identy donor, I would go to my friend(s) for fresh sperm. We have at least 2 friends who have an awesome personality and are dying to have kids . One of them is single and he lost his hopes that he will ever will meet his special one so he is really asking if we would use him at least he will have continuation of his family... the other friend's girl friend is not open him having a baby with us she already has a kid, but he does not and he wants to have a kid but she refuses to give birth ever again. Funny how life sometimes ironic those who want can't have those who don't want have (some or plenty)


OK looking forward for more info, hopefully from those who used other places/clinics. Congrats again!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

I think the cost was about $600 per vial of IUI identity release sperm plus $150-200 for shipping (special liquid nitrogen cannister). Access to all info on donors cost us about $150? This was all about 3 years ago, so my memory is a little fuzzy. You can check their current prices online easily and browse donors. You and your husband should look into how you're going to handle telling your kid (it's very hard to keep this a secret forever, especially when kids study genetics in high school) and whether you want to do an identy relsease donor. The main reason we picked California Cryobank was that they had the largest selection of identity release donors, but if that's not important to you, there are a lot of other banks. Fairfax Cryobank is in this area, so you might be able to save on shipping costs.

Anonymous wrote:We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Thank you for sharing and congrats on results

What about the cost, can you share that info, of course if you don't mind

We did IUIs Shady Grove, and were quite pleased. Dr. Osbourne was our main doctor. IUI. California Cryobank--all sperm banks have minimum standards for their sperm, so I don't think quality is usually an issue. Cost depends on ICI vs. IUI and whether a donor is willing to let the kid contact him when the kid is 18 (open or identity release donors). You can see baby pics of most of their donors. Your insurance will probably cover some of the costs.

ICI with frozen sperm takes an average of 12 months to conceive, so we went with IUI and DW got pregnant our 3rd month.

We're a lesbian couple, so it was basically a 0 sperm count issue for us. Shady Grove recommended some preliminary fertility testing for DW before she tried IUI, and the testing was pretty easy and covered by insurance. She said the IUI procedure really wasn't bad at all, and each one took less than 5 minutes.

Hi everyone I am a newbie in everything... Never had a kid, never tried before since hubby has 0 count of sperm. Now finally he is considering "OK" to use donor sperm. Sooooo I am doing me research. So first of all I apologies if my questions will be too bold or too much info to ask Second, definitely not interested in fresh sperm donor, hubby said ‘through the bank ONLY’… All info that I can find will be helpful. I would appreciate if you share your experience (real experience please, not what you read somewhere if you have done Home Insemination or ICI or IUI at the doctor. I person don’t think I have any medical issues. I am 33 healthy woman. My period is very sharp, comes 99% on time. Same symptoms every months (cramping etc.). I do see obvious sign of ovulation before period every month. But again my hubby has 0 count so I never had to use protection in my life and have no idea if I have any issues that I don’t know about. I also wonder about the cost, so I want to prep the budget for procedure. So mainly I have these question (although every day something new comes up and have more questions so any info will definitely help us) Thank you in advance.

1. Did you do it at home or at the doctor?
2. If the doctor what clinic / doctor was it? and Please, what is your review of their service regardless if was it positive or negative please share so we could understand who is good in this and who is bad.
3. Was it IUI (this method into uterus I think) or ICI (into vijeyjey ) and how much did you pay for service and meds? BTW, did you need to use meds?
4. Which sperm bank did you use and how was the quality of the sperm as well cost ($)

Hmm…. I know I asked a lot :-S Sorry but I truly will appreciate your help. Sometime being overwhelm with all the questions makes me push my research to next month… but I think I need to get serious while I am in better condition. And to all who try to conceive I wish you good luck, I hope you will get your results this month! Or this year whichever makes you happier.