I would insist that it be at your house for a two yr old. Otherwise you will have to baby proof their house before you leave in addition to bringing car seat, stroller, toys, pack n play, clothes (for bit of you if you will be flying to beach directly from grandparents), any lovies, sippy cup, etc. in addition you will need to go to grocery store at your parents to get diapers, wipes, special food (whole milk, toddler appropriate snacks). You will have to buy baby gates for stairs and hope they watch her- spring loaded ones aren't meant for top of stairs so they will need to make sure she doesn't try to climb them. It is too much for a two yr old especially if you can easily make it work in your house.

If your child was 4 and older then I would send her to grandparents- she wouldn't need as much stuff and could keep herself entertained for awhile.

I think a lot of this will come down to what you are comfortable with, rational or not (and I think there's a good argument for being at your house being more rational). You are understandably nervous about this first time away, andyour emotions are important, too.

If your child has never been there, here. My mom lives here and never tried to have my son over and wanted to and it was a disaster. She had to bring him back to our house. She insisted her house was easier and he knows the house but never slept there.

I think at 2, you can request at your house. When your little one is 4+ then their house is more appropriate.

Anonymous wrote:Your Dad has made a request. Honor it.

OP here. My Dad makes a lot of requests, PP. That doesn't mean they're all appropriate.

I'm going to have a talk with my parents this evening and try to come up with a good compromise, also to find out exactly now much vacation restriction Dad has. My mom is going to be doing the bulk of the childcare, as Dad works 9-5, so I want to make sure she's got the safest/easiest environment to work in. As a few other posts have shown, people forget how exhausting little kids can be for long stretches. This is a nice gift my parents are giving me (I never get this kind of break) so I want to show my appreciation, and not set them up for a hard week. Thanks for the replies.

You can't tell someone *how* they are going to do you a favor. Accept your Dad's requests or find someone else, or don't go.

Your Dad has made a request. Honor it.

I think your parents will be better off in their own home, and dd will be safer because they know it better. Having just come home from staying at an unfamiliar house, it is so difficult to do basic things like cook eggs when you don't know where the pan is, where the whisk is, etc. This will be tiring for them and there is a much greater risk of an accident when they are coping with an unfamiliar place/neighborhood/city. Think about them driving her around in an unfamiliar place - there are a lot of stressors to making them come.

In the end we have sent the kids to grandparents. My parents don't sleep that well at my house and I really want them to be rested when caring for young kids over a period of time. Also they are far more comfortable in their own environment and go out more (to parks, activities) and know there way around (driving).

Basically my kids are more adaptable to a new place than my parents are at this point.

My answer before reading your post - at your house.

Answer after reading your post - your house. Spin it that it will be best for your daughter. You will be away and it would be best for her to have familiar surroundings.

TL; DR but the answer is almost always come to your house, unless there are some majorly extenuating circumstances (your dad's schedule does not qualify as extenuating.)

Definitely stick to your plan of having them come here, and hire a bit more help for your mom for the time your dad won't be there.

Also, read the thread "need some perspective" for some wisdom on possibly pitfalls and some preparation ideas for the week.

I'd have your mom come here, if she is truly ok with that. Leave it up to your Dad if we wants to come for a few days or not. In case of an emergency, your friends, pediatrician, etc. are all here. If you haven't been away for more than 1 night, I would hesitate a bit about going for a whole week - could you do 4-5 days of the beach trip?

This is tough (as you know, which is why you posted). I think it so we hat depends on the personality of your DD. I have a son the same age and the benefits of keeping him home - his routine, his things, child-proofing - would far outweigh the benefits if him going to the grandparents'. I know other kids, though, who are better with different environments, not as inclined to get into things, etc.

I don't think you can bring up your dad's boundary stuff. It would bug me too but as you said they're very good with your kid and you have to pick battles. I'd strongly encourage them to come to you for the reasons you mentioned - and maybe offer to bring her to them later in the summer so he can spend extra time with her, since he'll miss out on some this round?

My parents are very involved with DD and do a great job, have since her birth. They live in the midwest and travel to see us here in DC every 8-10 weeks or so. This summer, some girlfriends and I are planning a beach trip together, no kids. I'm a single mom and this will be the first time I've been away from DD for more 1 night, and I'm nervous about it. So, my parents very generously offered to come to DC to watch DD that week. I am excited and feel good about this plan.

Yesterday my Dad expressed that he'd much rather have me bring DD to my parent's hometown. He doesn't have the freedom to travel that my mom has (she's retired, he still works), and due to vacation limitations, he would only be able to come to Wash, DC for a few days if the week occurred here (my mom is ok traveling to DC and handling the week herself). He loves DD immensely and I want to make this as easy as possible for everyone, given my parent's generosity with the week.

My concerns: My parents are a young 65, but their house is a 3 floor row house with lots of stairs, doors that open to stairwells, etc. They have art and other objects at kid level, and a dog. Also, finding a ticket that goes through the midwest will be $$$.

I live in a single floor 2 bed condo, all baby-proofed. You can cook, shower, etc., and if DD wanders out of site for a min or two there's no emergency (obvs I watch her but she freely plays when I cook, for example). She's enrolled in a summer playgroup down the street, grocery store's walkable, and it would keep her on her routine here.

Last detail: I love my Dad, but he is a boundary-pusher. We have butted heads on several occasions over what is safe for DD, and we don't always agree on things (nothing crazy, but he wants the dog to play with her on the floor, took her for long walks in 95 degree weather as a newborn in the Moby, etc.).

In summary: My parents are really helping me out here, and I know my Dad would never intentionally let DD come to harm. But there are far more unknowns in their house than mine, and fewer opportunities for things to go wrong if DD stays in Washington.

Please help me with my perspective. Thanks.