Anonymous wrote:You should listen to her. No need for a third.

This is ridiculous. OP and her husband have every right to plan for the family size they want without unsolicited advice from MIL and anonymous Internet posters.

Anonymous wrote:Three is selfish.

Please tell that to women in developing countries with no running water.

My MIL wrote in my son's (second child) baby book, "We [FIL] feel like your family is complete!". After all, we had one boy and one girl, the perfect family.

My MIL is the most narrow minded person I can think of; if she can't directly relate/hasn't experienced something personally, she lacks empathy. She had two children, so therefore, this is right and normal.

Then, we had our third. She was shocked! And couldn't wait to ask me if this baby was an accident.

Maybe your MIL is the same way? Did she only have two and therefore that is the ideal?

Glare at her and say "Don't worry, you won't be related to the 3rd anyway."

Just ignore her or say that you will def be having a third and it makes you uncomfortable to hear her saying things like this.

You need to not let this get under your skin. Unless she's saying this because your kids are monsters or you are completely overwhelmed and it shows (neither of which seems to be the case) she is speaking more about what she could handle (and it sounds like kids weren't her thing) than really reflecting on you and your family. I think these comments warrant an internal eye roll and nothing more.

Three is selfish.

I understand the comment to ignore because maybe it's the reaction she is lookiing for, however, if she is saying it in front of the kids, I'd put a stop to it right away.

Tell her you're hoping for twins next.

I think you could look straight at her, once, and say firmly, "I think that is something for DH and me to decide."

And then ignore.

You should listen to her. No need for a third.

Unless you are hounding her for financial help or childcare...this is not her business. At all.

My mom used to do this to my B/SIL. She is a control freak and has high anxiety and has a strong need to predict the world. It's not about you.

Ignore her. If she doesn't get a rise out of you it may reduce her comments.

Does anyone else's MIL make obnoxious comments instructing them how many kids they should have? I don't mean a comment once or twice, but repeated comments that are just so bitchy. We have two wonderful kids (1 and 3) and MIL says that we should not have any more because we have a boy and a girl. We are great parents, are financially secure, happy, etc, and like being parents! We think we'd probably like a 3rd down the line. MIL lives nearby but is very hands off with our two kids. She helps out very rarely and we have pretty low expectations of her involvement. She always acts like seeing our kids is a chore or a check the box type of deal. She is generally not very warm, always worried about the wrong things, and I get the impression that she was too stressed about keeping up with the Joneses to really enjoy being a mother to my husband and her other son when they were young. It is just SO frustrating and rude for her to constantly, forcefully assert her rude opinion! One, we never asked her opinion! Two, we will most likely have a 3rd child, so should we just assume that she will hate our 3rd kid since it's "such a terrible idea"?

Ugh, why can't MIL just keep her obnoxious comments to herself!