It is a sign of desperation to jump into a new relationship before the last one is even done. Obviously to some people marriage is pretty meaningless so they don't care about ending it before starting another relationship but I would run from any one who wanted to get into a serious relationship while they were still married and detangling themselves from that one.

Their marriage may be over. The questions you should also be asking is whether he is emotionally ready to move on. He may think he is, but may be a mess inside. Or someone who never learned lessons from his marriage.

I'll take the other side. Have papers been filed? The waiting period is 6 months in VA with no kids. Who initiated the separation?
I dated my now husband when I was separated. The separation/divorce process took about 9 months from moving out to divorce. I never talked to ex again a few months into the whole thing. I initiated the divorce, and I had already moved on by the time if decided I wanted to divorce. There was zero interest in reconciling.
I think it really depends on the situation. Are they living separately? Separation agreement ironed out? Do they still talk?

got involved with someone separated but not yet divorced. very intense for a few month and then he freaked out. decided it was too early...wasn't ready for a serious relationship. sample size of one but does make me wary....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Newly dating a man who is separated in VA, but not yet divorced.
I know DCUM will give it to me straight.
What are things I need to know?

Anything and everything.

You really want it straight?

You are a fool. There is no man on the planet in this situation who is worth getting involved with. Find someone who is really available.

+1

OP here. Message received. Thanks.

Don't date him.

Are you just looking to get a nice dinner and some good sex? Then go for it.

But don't hold your breath and hope that he would be a good partner. His life is too chaotic.

Don't do it. Take it from someone who's been there. Good advice above.

He is still married. He may end up back with his wife. He is the middle of his marriage breaking up. He isn't in a place for a new serious relationship. He isn't single. he may or may not be officially separated - that is a line married people use when cheating on their spouses.

Anonymous wrote:Newly dating a man who is separated in VA, but not yet divorced.
I know DCUM will give it to me straight.
What are things I need to know?

Anything and everything.

You really want it straight?

You are a fool. There is no man on the planet in this situation who is worth getting involved with. Find someone who is really available.

Anonymous wrote:Ask to see the paperwork.

If he sleeps with you he could be found at fault in his divorce.

Personally, I wouldn't engage. Separation means less than a year after several years in a relationship. No matter what he says, he only wants to get laid and is not going to be emotionally available.

This.

Ask to see the paperwork.

If he sleeps with you he could be found at fault in his divorce.

Personally, I wouldn't engage. Separation means less than a year after several years in a relationship. No matter what he says, he only wants to get laid and is not going to be emotionally available.

Is divorce paperwork filed? When can it be filed?

Newly dating a man who is separated in VA, but not yet divorced.
I know DCUM will give it to me straight.
What are things I need to know?

Anything and everything.