Anonymous wrote:Yes but you married him. Bet he's been like this the whole time you've known him.

You again, why are you so smug all the time? It's pretty pathetic how you need to say this on every post someone complains about their husband, for you to feel good about yourself. Get a life.

Yes but you married him. Bet he's been like this the whole time you've known him.

Did his mom do all his bargaining for him before you stepped into the picture? Where are these kinds of meek adults from?

OP I wouldn't say he's an asshole but I do think you're coddling him. What would happen if you didn't talk to the contractors and pay the bills? do you think he might step up to the plate? If not, I say social anxiety. If yes then you only have yourself to blame for letting it go this long

Yes he sounds passive but the asshole part of it is that he is blaming and getting mad at OP for not communicating his thoughts and desires accurately and he should just communicate directly himself. Plus he's making her do a lot of the heavy lifting.

How old was he when you got married?

You are an enabler and now you have to deal with the consequences.

Gross OP. Stop enabling him.

Anonymous wrote:He doesn't sound like an asshole. He just sounds passive and not assertive. What is he like at work?

Agree with this. He doesn't like confrontation and you catered to him, by always being the middle man so he is used to it. I don't see any signs of mental illness, which every likes to scream about with every little thing. Asshole? No... A pussy and needs to man the fuck up? Yes...

He doesn't sound like an asshole. He just sounds passive and not assertive. What is he like at work?

I two weeks I hope to be divorced from one of these. In my case, I think money made it worse. The more he had, the more miserable he became...

Anonymous wrote:Agree with social anxiety.

+2. He needs a shrink and medication and therapy. He has a mental health issue and OP should get him help.

Given a recent topic in the political topics area, may I ask?

-is he a conservative or a liberal?

Agree with social anxiety.

This will probably get moved to the Relationship forum.

But anyway, what you describe is classic social anxiety on his part.

He is non confrontational (except with me - i take the brunt) which means I am the person that has to deal with any issues that may involve confrontation - even the most remote possibilty has him freeze. So i deal with issues related to billing, repairs, etc. Problem with comcast, i call, the doctors bill is wrong, I call, ordering a pizza, i call.

So, we just had an addition put on our house several months ago and we are experiencing an electrical issue. My husband, who is very familiar with house stuff due to his line of work asked me to call the contractor. So I call the contractor who is telling me what might be causing the problem and I am repeating this outloud. In the meantime, my idiot husband is standing in front of me shaking his head no, saying that isn't the problem because he already checked the blah, blah, blah and the blah, blah, blah was blah, blah blah. So I am trying to convey this to the contractor and butchering it becasue i am not understanding. So I whisper to my husband that maybe he should talk to the guy and he gets pissed, grabs the phone from me and storms out to talk to the guy.

Throughout the building process, i was the one playing middle man between him and contractors because of one big blow up they had early in the process. he is terrified to talk to them and I got stuck being the go between which stressed me out to no end because I dont have that knowledge. My husband would come home and literally question some of the work they did and implying it is MY fault for allowing it. He conveniently forgot that I was taking time off from work to deal with the times they were at home - not him. He also forgot that he has balls.

Vent over.