I always go to bed early - DH and his family are all night owls and I'm a morning person. He stays up watching movies with his sisters - I like that they have that time alone.

My SIL's BF of many years is on my same schedule and I hope he marries into the family because he and I get up and make breakfast for everyone.

I do the same!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I go to bed early as often as is plausible, because by evening I can't take it anymore.

+100. And I also take very long showers, run to the store a few times a day for milk, bread or other necessities, and get important calls from work.

They're not here to see me, they just aren't. they want time with the kids & DH, so it's better for everyone if i'm no there watching them feed the kids candy from morning to night or giving DH guilt trips about whatever

This. They aren't really that interested in me. I think it's a relief for us all when I make myself scarce.

I go to bed early most nights for some down time. If they enjoy the one on one time, great. I think my MIL has learned after a bad experience or two never to go through me to communicate to DH. I talk to her one on one as little as possible.

Anonymous wrote:I go to bed early as often as is plausible, because by evening I can't take it anymore.

+100. And I also take very long showers, run to the store a few times a day for milk, bread or other necessities, and get important calls from work.

They're not here to see me, they just aren't. they want time with the kids & DH, so it's better for everyone if i'm no there watching them feed the kids candy from morning to night or giving DH guilt trips about whatever

I think it's a good thing, OP. I'm now a mother-in-law, and I love having some one-on-one time with my son.

I go to bed early as often as is plausible, because by evening I can't take it anymore.

Anonymous wrote:Yes.
Unless your MIL views it as some kind of snub, but probably not.

My MIL is the opposite. She feels she can never get through to her son, so uses me to pass messages along... as lovely as she is, it can get wearing

+1. My DH doesn't like to do long chats so his mother actually gets more info from our conversations.

Last time they visited, I left the country.

I always send my husband out for a nice dinner with his mother and I hang out at home w/ the kids. It is a nice break for everyone

I do this sort of. When my MIL visits, she usually comes Fri-Mon. I will take off either just Monday or Friday and DH takes both days usually. Or if timing permits, he just takes a half day one of those days and I don't (if she gets in say Friday afternoon and leaves Monday morning)- I think its kind of nice for them to have a little time just the two of them. No real issues, but I know that sometimes I like a little one on one convo with my parents too sometimes.

I always make myself scarce when the laws visit. For one, they are so "secretive" about anything that has to do with SIL, and they won't spill the dirt unless I am out of the room. Then of course my DH tells me everything after they leave. SIL is a total drama queen pain in the ass, and the stories are quite entertaining.

Yes.
Unless your MIL views it as some kind of snub, but probably not.

My MIL is the opposite. She feels she can never get through to her son, so uses me to pass messages along... as lovely as she is, it can get wearing

I think that's brilliant.

I do it too. I "get a headache" and go to bed early one night out of a visit also.

I want them to have an opportunity to talk with their son without me around. We have been married for 7 years, together for 9 and generally have a good relationship with the in laws. However MiL and I have had it out a couple of times and I don't think she feels comfortable communicating sensitive issues around me (there is ongoing drama with SIL). Do you think I'm doing the right thing by giving them some space?