OP, this sounds like my marriage b4 ex DH left. He said he was not getting what he needs out of the marriage both physically and emotionally. He had no communication capabilities so I had no way to improve. You need to talk to him.

Anonymous wrote:If he is rejecting your sex, and picking at everything little thing you do, then another female is involved with him. He is trying to find stuff to get you upset enough to leave him, without it being his fault.

He isn't rejecting it. It just isn't improving anything outside the bed. The last time we had a big discussion about how to improve things he said more sex. So I decided to do even more than he asked for. He asked for 2x a week, and I've been trying for 2-3 times a day on the weekend.

Right there with you, OP. On one of our dates, hitting the grocery store afterwards, DH (boyfriend at the time) threw me in the shopping cart and zoomed me around the store. Now I can't even pull the stick out of his ass to laugh at a show together. It's ridiculous.

If he is rejecting your sex, and picking at everything little thing you do, then another female is involved with him. He is trying to find stuff to get you upset enough to leave him, without it being his fault.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe try driving better? Or let her drive. Does she have back and neck pain? Banging over a speed bump or pothole etc really can hurt.

Clearly that's just one issue but thought I'd weigh in on that one.

Ok, not acceptable to criticize driving unless tickets or accidents. This is getting too picky.

Anonymous wrote:No, I pushed those two babies out myself. Not male.

I did try talking to him about it. He says he did it because I snapped at him and that he was justified. He also says the yelling about my driving Friday night was justified because he didn't know whether I was aware of the things I pointed out. He says my snapping at him about the Ow! thing is proof I have anger issues.

This is what he always does if I call him on something. It's always my fault somehow. He never admits he could have reacted better without spending 30 minutes running me down first.

PP DH here. Hmmm, finances are tight? He may feel he is not providing enough?

And I kind of suspected you were DW, b/c the whole more sex thing really only works on men

Maybe try driving better? Or let her drive. Does she have back and neck pain? Banging over a speed bump or pothole etc really can hurt.

Clearly that's just one issue but thought I'd weigh in on that one.

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like you need a weekend away to reconnect. Someone is feeling hurt or disrespected or unappreciated or stressed out. Get it out in the open before resentment starts to build. You are each processing the other's actions through your own interpretations and are probably wrong.

Tight finances generally not helped by vacations. Maybe just try to have weekday lunches without kids

No, I pushed those two babies out myself. Not male.

I did try talking to him about it. He says he did it because I snapped at him and that he was justified. He also says the yelling about my driving Friday night was justified because he didn't know whether I was aware of the things I pointed out. He says my snapping at him about the Ow! thing is proof I have anger issues.

This is what he always does if I call him on something. It's always my fault somehow. He never admits he could have reacted better without spending 30 minutes running me down first.

Yeah. DH here. Men don't really fathom how all consuming being a mom is for most moms. There is a lifetime of weighty responsibility that the moms have now. Being fun is for the young I'm afraid. Snapping doesn't help, neither does lamenting how serious everyone is now. Try to take care of things and take some loads off spouse mind, whatever weighs on them or consume most of their time.

Sounds like you need a weekend away to reconnect. Someone is feeling hurt or disrespected or unappreciated or stressed out. Get it out in the open before resentment starts to build. You are each processing the other's actions through your own interpretations and are probably wrong.

I assume you are male, OP?

Have you bothered even talking to her about this?

Anonymous wrote:How are your finances?

Not great short term. Very little savings after house purchase. Long term outlook strong. We both earn a fair bit. Right now I earn more.

How are your finances?

You made me laugh the first time we had dinner. That was something I looked for in a spouse. I would have dinged you right there if you hadn't. Before the kids, same thing. I remember standing behind you in the bathroom after our trip to Africa making horns around your head and playing "What animal am I?"

So how did we get here? I ask you to ride with me to pick up DD Friday night and you criticize my driving. I initiate sex Saturday and think all is good. That afternoon the kids and I are chatting about how we will decorate the house for Christmas. I hit the lip between the street and our driveway pulling in and you scream, "Ow!"

When I snap at you to stop criticizing my driving, you storm out of the car, slam the door, go into the house and slam that door. The kids want to know why you're so mad. Then we sit in the driveway and talk about Christmas decorations.

Last night we take the kids out to an activity they have wanted to do for awhile. On the way home I ask the kids if they had fun. They both say yes. I ask you. You dully say it was fine.

Where did the fun go? How am I suppose to live with someone who can find little good to say about me?

Many on this board say sex is the answer, but even that is not working. Last weekend I tried 2-3 times per day, but once Monday hit it was like it never happened.