It's fine to have just appetizers as long as your party is at an "off" hour. Just say in your invite that you will be serving "hors d'ouevres and drinks".

Why does everyone assume i'm cheap? It's really that I'm lazy (a much more admirable sin .

I'm looking to have fun with my neighbors, have already said that I won't ask people to bring food -- now am looking for some helpful input about how to host a party without serving a full dinner. I don't want to deal with the dishes, don't have enough chairs for everyone, lots of picky kids involved, etc.

So no one hs ever had a party without serving dinner??

It sounds like a really cheap/stingy idea that you would "host" a party and then expect people to bring appetizers and stuff. Of course, people will offer to bring stuff. Many will bring wine. Your better friends will insist on bringing something. Be a gracious host not a cheap one. And no, 4 appetizers is not enough for a party. If you're so budget conscious -- why not make chili or have "make your own tacos" plus the appetzers?

I can start whenever; I really have a hard time believing that I'm being cheap/tacky by not wanting to serve a full meal?

I've hosted this group before, everyone brought something - ranging from a full dish to a 6 pack

Are you starting at 4? When are you ending? I'm having a hard time imagining a holiday party that starts at 4 and doesn't cross the dinner hour.

I think a cookie exchange works because you bring something but also go home with cookies. An appetizer exchange doesn't work because people aren't going home with appetizers...

I agree that it depends on your group of friends. In the past the houses around us all decided it would be fun to have a holiday get together. We ended up hosting since we had the most kids and best set up for the kids to play while the adults talked. We did a potluck and it was a blast. I believe it is all in how you plan the event.

It's neighbors who we're friendly with, but not good friends per sea. I was thinking of like a cookie exchange, but an appetizer one -- something about it did seem a bit off though.

Maybe I don't say anything, supplement my menu with Trader Joe's appetizers, and if anyone asks tell them we'll just be having appetizers?

Do I let people know that it's an appetizer only party?

Depends on who you're inviting. In our circle of friends that would be typical. If it's people who don't already know their way around your kitchen, I wouldn't ask people to contribute.

Weird to ask people to bring stuff. If you don't want to cook, buy stuff in/cater.

I don't mind being asked. Baking is my thing so I love the WOW. If they offer, accept but don't ask.

I hate being asked to bring something to a party. I was willing to do that in my 20s but think it's odd when I get those kinds of invites now. It is strange, because I will offer to bring something, but being "invited" to a party in the same sentence as I'm asked to bring a dish just rubs me the wrong way.

I had a holiday party 2 years ago and almost every single person asked if they could bring something. I told everyone no but soo many people brought food or beer, it was actually strange. I concluded that my group of friends is a lot more casual than I am - they were all used to parties where that's what you do whereas I will bring a hostess gift but never a dish unless asked.

Tacky to ask people to bring food when you are really just serving snacks and not a real meal. Well, even with a meal, it is tacky. That is not a holiday party. That is a pot-luck on the cheap.

Yes, I think it's a little tacky to ask guests to bring something to your holiday party. To lighten the load on yourself, buy some stuff pre-made in addition to your existing menu, like a nice platter of meat/cheese/olives. And don't forget the sweets even if it's an "appetizer only" party. If there are kids, they will appreciate something like cookies, as will adults with a sweet tooth.

I'm sure folks are hosting holiday parties - what are on your menus?

I'm leaning towards an appetizer only party (4ish?), and asking folks to bring an appetizer (is that tacky?)

- butternut squash & ricotta bruschetta
- spinach balls
- sausage & cheese balls
- mini pizzas
- veggies with dip
- hot coco and mulled cider - with booze on the side for the grown ups