Why are your feelings more important than your hostess' feelings? This sort of gross inconsideration masquerading as good etiquette is absurd.

Flowers or potted plant or wine or chocolates or a little kit of coffee…

All are stuff that don't have to be consumed that day, or are non-consumable. All are things that are not permanent (i.e., next time you go over there if you don't see the plant or the chocolates you brought, you won't be upset or even think twice. But if you bring a table trinket, she'll be secretly annoyed because it is something she can't get rid of or may feel she has to display, and it's almost never what someone wants.

A lot of this works for holiday presents as well, btw. Last Christmas my DB gave my DH a huge painting (horrible) and I almost had a heart attack. Fortunately the painting went to DH's office

I usually bring a sparkling "ade" from Balduccis - orangeade, lemonade, etc. Enjoyed by kids and adults.

flowers. Don't bring food if hostess says not to. I hate when people bring food when i've planned a meal.

I would bring high end baking ingredients -- spices from Penzys, a block of good semi sweet chocolate, a tool she might not have like a Danish dough wisk (you don't realize you want this until you have this), a bouquet of flours (a collection of different flours -- there are more types than you think and it is fun to experiment (potato, rye, French, ancient grain, etc. just look at Bob Mills or KIng Arthur int the store).

I would bring some type of small potted flower or plant. That way she doesn't have to do anything except find a place to put it.

Don't bring fruit salad. Your hostess has planned the meal to include fruit or fruit salad. Now she has to deal with yours. Very inconsiderate.

Champagne.

Please don't bring anything that needs to be consumed right away. If I plan a meal and people bring additional food, it screws up my plans and is awkward. They have food covered.

Bring champagne, bring wine, bring flowers, but don't bring food!

Champagne if they are drinkers, Flowers, really good cheese, maybe fruit salad.

Flowers

Cheese plate is always good. But good cheese, not prepackaged stuff. Mommy, just thinking about it. Or fruit is a good choice!

Agree about OJ and champagne or flowers, or an artisanal te or coffee.

I would bring oj and champagne. Or fruit salad. Or flowers.but do not bring a baker baked goods.

Friends said to bring nothing, but I absolutely cannot walk into their house with my hands empty. I literally wouldn't sleep at nights. Friends DW is an amazing baker...it's basically a side business for her. Not sure if she would appreciate something store bought, but I don't know. Maybe some dedicated bakers out there could enlighten me.

Putting aside wine (obvious), what would you bring? They have two kids who are about 9 and 11.