With me, initially it is looks that attracts me at first. There just has to be that certain something that physically attracts me to someone...They don't necessarily have to be "handsome" to other people..But they have to have something that appeals to me and attracts me. I am in my mid-forties and many people tell me that at my age, looks shouldn't matter, but I couldn't disagree more. Physical attraction IS very important in any romantic relationships...Otherwise how else would you differentiate it from just a regular friendship??! Right??

After the whole looks thing, personality and character matter most.

I would say 80%.
If a guy is physically attractive to me, but his personality is just not compatible w/mine, unless I am thinking "booty call," I won't waste my time on him.
Sometimes I cannot even pin point why I do not feel any chemistry w/someone...It's just either there or not there.

I would like to think that people like my personality, but I know that for most men it is my looks. And that is a disaster because they approach too soon for me to be comfortable and mostly I am insulted.

I don't think I'm particularly good-looking, but I've had truly phenomenal luck with men. The hottest 5% are not interested in me, but I usually have my pick from the other 95%, which is more than enough.

My best guess is that I'm approachable, both in looks and personality. Cute without being intimidatingly hot, friendly without being obnoxious. I'm easy to talk to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think we are drawn to people initially because of their looks, meaning we walk across the room to get their number or click on their picture online or ask a friend to introduce you. But we fall in love with the personality. I have dated folks whom I thought were very attractive, but as I learned about their personality, they became less attractive. And I have found that the more I like being with someone, the more attractive they become.

+1

+2 I dated someone once who I swear was model material. He literally turned heads. But the more I got to know him, the less attractive he became until I couldn't see what the initial attraction was in the end.

looks first but I have dated some hot men that I found ugly when I got to know them. And vice versa! It is the inside that matters most.

Looks. I have a dry sense of humor, and I hate small talk, so people don't enjoy me nearly as much as my husband. He's beautiful sweet and charming. It was definitely his personality that I fell in love with. He's just so freaking happy, you can't help it!

My sex appeal.

Starts with looks, love may grow.

Anonymous wrote:I think we are drawn to people initially because of their looks, meaning we walk across the room to get their number or click on their picture online or ask a friend to introduce you. But we fall in love with the personality. I have dated folks whom I thought were very attractive, but as I learned about their personality, they became less attractive. And I have found that the more I like being with someone, the more attractive they become.

+1

I think we are drawn to people initially because of their looks, meaning we walk across the room to get their number or click on their picture online or ask a friend to introduce you. But we fall in love with the personality. I have dated folks whom I thought were very attractive, but as I learned about their personality, they became less attractive. And I have found that the more I like being with someone, the more attractive they become.

looks, for most people

Total looks. Our personalities are completely opposite but we balance each other and just click. However, I'm pretty sure the looks put the ring on it.

Well DH and I met online, so I suppose the original attraction was based on looks. But it was my personality that made him fall in love with me. No way would we have as great of a marriage if it was based on looks.

DH and all my past boyfriends were friends of mine, either in person or online, long before we became romantic. They have all been quite handsome and I suspect out of my league going on looks alone, and I wonder if they would've dismissed me in a blind-date scenario. Maybe it's been a blessing in disguise, because we knew we were compatible before getting into a relationship.

How about for others?