Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Telling a three month old to hush is a bit stupid.

None of us have any idea how it was said. Context and tone are everything. It could have been a playful hush. I definitely talked to my kids and other babies in this way--a very silly "who's making all that noise?? Is that you baby?"

+1 One of my favorite lullabies was Hush Little Baby Don't Say A Word.

Anonymous wrote:Telling a three month old to hush is a bit stupid.

None of us have any idea how it was said. Context and tone are everything. It could have been a playful hush. I definitely talked to my kids and other babies in this way--a very silly "who's making all that noise?? Is that you baby?"

Telling a three month old to hush is a bit stupid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses although I grew up with two loving grandparents one of which I named my daughter after I will let it go. She never comes to visit unless we pay for her to anyway and now we have other priorities which are not her visits. It will probably be two years before I'll feel like flying out with my daughter and being bother with her again anyway. It's a plus not living in the same region. I never said anyone was abused but both sets of parents can be verbally hostile and say inappropriate things to children/people.

And you think telling a kid to hush is inappropriate?

And, regardless of how hard you try and how much you love your children there will come a day when you cringe at something that comes out of your mouth. You have set a standard that no one can meet.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses although I grew up with two loving grandparents one of which I named my daughter after I will let it go. She never comes to visit unless we pay for her to anyway and now we have other priorities which are not her visits. It will probably be two years before I'll feel like flying out with my daughter and being bother with her again anyway. It's a plus not living in the same region. I never said anyone was abused but both sets of parents can be verbally hostile and say inappropriate things to children/people.

Go back and read your post OP. YOU used the word "beatings."

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses although I grew up with two loving grandparents one of which I named my daughter after I will let it go. She never comes to visit unless we pay for her to anyway and now we have other priorities which are not her visits. It will probably be two years before I'll feel like flying out with my daughter and being bother with her again anyway. It's a plus not living in the same region. I never said anyone was abused but both sets of parents can be verbally hostile and say inappropriate things to children/people.

And you think telling a kid to hush is inappropriate?

Thanks for the responses although I grew up with two loving grandparents one of which I named my daughter after I will let it go. She never comes to visit unless we pay for her to anyway and now we have other priorities which are not her visits. It will probably be two years before I'll feel like flying out with my daughter and being bother with her again anyway. It's a plus not living in the same region. I never said anyone was abused but both sets of parents can be verbally hostile and say inappropriate things to children/people.

That was nothing, OP. You're primed for a fight.

I'm not seeing the problem. Why can't she tell the kid to hush?

So you're connecting a "hush" to beatings and verbal abuse. That's a mighty big leap, mama. Perhaps it's time to dial it back.

Is your MIL annoying and possibly rude? Probably. But you only visit a couple of times a year and for just a weekend. Let it sit.

Hush? Seriously? I'm all for cutting off granny at the first time of something, but a hush? Really?

OP you need to ignore her. Unless she is directly addressing you, simply don't respond. And suck it up. This is her grandchild and she will do much worse!

She sounds passive aggressive - ignore, ignore, ignore.

(Short version, yes, you are being to reactionary.)

I hate daughter in laws.

If you only see her twice a year let if go until the next visit. What is the point in hashing it out now? You know your MIL is going to be rude and then you will have to deal with that.

My advice is to accept she is not a nice person and limit contact.

My spouse and I were visiting mil with our 3 month old for the first time over weekend. She lives in another state and we only see her once or twice a year. She has a history of saying inappropriate or insensitive things. After being at her house for an hour she tells my 3 month old daughter to hush. She was not crying but was babbling while I was holding and playing with her. I made an audible gasp and aww like sound. She sees my expression, laughs and says I guess your momma didn't like that. I was not sure what to think or say to her. An hour later on the way to our hotel I speak to my husband about what happened. He says he only heard her comment about my reaction and not the actual hush . He tells me that she must have been playing. We have discussed in the past about being deliberate in wanting to have a different experience in raising our daughter as compared to our parents who used beatings and being verbally harsh at time. I later told my husband that in the future we need to respond if this occurs again. I'm sure my spouse will not bring this up to his mom but I'm wondering if I should bring it up and discuss with her. I'm also wondering if I'm being too sensitive as a first time mom. Also every day of our three day visit she complained about schedule. That we visited her ex husband and his wife too long. Now that we have a daughter we want her to have the ability to spend time and get to know him as well. When we would arrive she would comment about her jealousy and that they were waiting for us although we would let her know our plans each day. We would also provide updates when she would call us to see what we were doing. Wondering if I should explain this as well or just let it all go til the next time.