I'd love it if my parents or my mother in law actually ASKED for photos! As it is I send them about once or twice a month and barely even get a response.

Anonymous wrote: I feel like my parents expect to have the same access and experience with my new baby that I and DH are having. Their own parents lived without 24/7 access- why can't they?

My folks are the same way. They want to facetime with my one month old. They just stare at her, oohing and ahhing. They don't talk to my DH or me (I mean, they barely say hi, and do they ask us how we're doing? Hah!), they just want us to hold her up in front of the camera for their amusement. Oh, and they get upset if she's crying or if her eyes are closed. So, they basically are obsessed with her for the ten minutes a day she's not sleeping, hungry or needs a diaper change. I would just stop sending pictures, OP.

My parents do this as well and yeah, it gets tiresome. Amazing how once upon a time we had film cameras that pretty much limited the number of photos you could take and send to people unless you wanted to spend a fortune on film. When we were kids, grandma got a few photos and a school portrait shot for her fridge; today, grandma wants loads of pictures just because technology enables us to take loads of pictures and send them on demand. Still, that doesn't mean that we're now required to send them loads of photos of every moment in our child's life just because we're capable of doing so. I feel like my parents expect to have the same access and experience with my new baby that I and DH are having. Their own parents lived without 24/7 access- why can't they?

Anonymous wrote:Do we have the same in-laws? I had the same problem for DD's first six months...I was sending photos every 1-2 weeks and receiving emails saying "we want more." after awhile I got frustrated and stopped sending them altogether - made DH handle it. I don't get the annoying emails anymore and in return when I do get a great shot or two I forward them on to the ILs.

I wish I had these in-laws. Mine perversely complain and say our kids are "the most photographed kids in history". Perverse, I know. As a result we didn't even get the traditional high school graduation photo. No, I can't explain it except that MIL is passive aggressive so has to criticize everything we do.

Upload everything to Flickr - unfiltered and untitled - just include the date taken. Set up your privacy filters so that only family can see. Let people download and print what they want.

I have a HS friend who's mother is also a prominent local writer / columnist and "grandma" posts more pics and person info on FB than "mom" does. I have explained to my mom multiple times that no one posts pics of my kids on FB except me and no one tags my kids as me or DH. It's a bit harsh - but my parents are over sharers - they genuinely mean well, but don't understand boundaries or basic safety stuff like not posting "we're off for a 2 week vacation!" Aka "please come rob my house!".

Do we have the same in-laws? I had the same problem for DD's first six months...I was sending photos every 1-2 weeks and receiving emails saying "we want more." after awhile I got frustrated and stopped sending them altogether - made DH handle it. I don't get the annoying emails anymore and in return when I do get a great shot or two I forward them on to the ILs.

Anonymous wrote:Put this back on DH, if they want daily pictures he needs to send them.

Definitely put it on DH if it is getting to be a source of stress for you.

And I get it about not wanting to share every photo you take. There is no way I would do that.

My MIL was super pushy about this at first and I was like, "in addition to caring for my newborn you expect me to get it together to send you pictures every day"? But after a while things calmed down, and I enjoy sending her a few pictures every week, plus she sees other ones on Facebook. It's really not a big deal - just send them one a week and that should be fine.

OP,

Way to exaggerate! Your in-laws aren't looking for ALL pictures, they are looking for the good shots that you found good enough to frame. Send them the cream of the crop via flicker, smugmug or on a flash drive/disk. Get them a digital picture frame while you're at it.

They obviously just like your kids. (Sorry they have to put up with a priss like you.)

I just post everything on smugmug, they can access it with a password whenever they feel like seeing what's new, and they can print out what they want.

Put this back on DH, if they want daily pictures he needs to send them.

I would ignore them if you are sending pics once a month that's plenty. If they want more then have DH do it.

Anonymous wrote:Can't you just text them some pics that you take with your phone? Ignore the rest.

We do! At least once a week. But daily?

Can't you just text them some pics that you take with your phone? Ignore the rest.

My inlaws seem to think there is no such thing as sending too many pictures. They also seem to be under the impression that every single picture we take we should be sharing with them. I am generally a very private person and I don't post pictures online and am just generally private. My inlaws are the polar opposite and share and tell everyone everything, gossip, etc.

If they were to see a picture in a frame at our house or in a photo album on our shelves or on our computer, and they were not given that picture, they would make a comment "Oh, we never saw that picture!" and then ask for us to send it to them. They treat it like every picture of ours is really their picture to have. I feel like I share more than enough, probably more than I would like to already and I don't think its unreasonable to think that I wouldn't send them every single picture.

My parents seem to be much more content about pictures and aren't always asking about them. We send them regularly enough and they enjoy them but they don't expect a daily picture but probably wouldn't be opposed to it.

How do you parents/inlaws handle pictures of your kids? Do you think its reasonable to not send every single picture you take with the grandparents? Do you send daily pictures of your kids to the grandparents? I just can't imagine everyone sending their parents/inlaws daily pictures, every picture they take, etc.

(This isn't the first grandchild on either side - and he's 13 months by the way. This is just how my inlaws are and I don't think things will settle, if I had 10 kids this is how they would act)