I know a family that did this and their DC was much happier. For them it was absolutely worth it.

Anonymous wrote:Holy cow, I would have died of shame if my parents kept me back for anything other than academic issues. I know that with a school transfer, nobody outside the family needs to know, but YIKES. I was a late September birthday and was almost always the youngest kid. Somehow I survived.

Well bless your heart.

Holy cow, I would have died of shame if my parents kept me back for anything other than academic issues. I know that with a school transfer, nobody outside the family needs to know, but YIKES. I was a late September birthday and was almost always the youngest kid. Somehow I survived.

I know people for whom it was successful.

I'm the original poster. Thank you, everyone, for such thoughtful responses. I wish I had a few more months to watch my child's development and think about it, but the application deadlines for the new schools will be looming soon. Thanks again, everyone, and I'd still love more input if anybody else out there has been in a similar situation.

Anonymous wrote:Lots of transfers do this. I've seen it as late as junior year in high school.

Yup -- and it works out perfectly fine. How do I know this? I have 3 kids, all with summer birthdays, and all repeated a grade when they moved from public to private school as middle schoolers. At the time, they were all doing great, both academically and socially, but we were advised by friends with older kids that it's tough socially to be one of the youngest kids in middle and high school grades. This was absolutely spot-on. For our kids, being at the older end of the age range never led to boredom. Instead, they blossomed, developing into confident and independent young people, now ranging in age from 17 - 23.

Lots of transfers do this. I've seen it as late as junior year in high school.

Fourith grade seems late in the ballgame to be thinking about this OP. If he does fine in school why would you hold him back? Sounds helicopter to me.

The children I know who were redshirted at later dates, tended to be redshirted specifically for sports, although sometimes for admittance purposes.

My child is close in age to your child, and my child would take the idea of being held back as a personal blow. A friend recently redshirted his son (repeated 5th grade after changing schools) and his son didn't care - his son was redshirted for sports purposes. Consider what opinion your child might have. Definitely discuss it with your child before you do it.

If your child is academically on target, I'd be cautious. When they spend such a long day in school, it is awful to be bored. Children mature at different rates. My child's among the youngest and yet physically one of the more mature. One of my child's good friends at school is among the oldest, and socially among the least mature (close to my child's level). As puberty strikes, those elements can change radically.

If your child is on board, if you're confident your child will not be bored by academics due to being held back, and redshirting will give you an improved chance at a much wanted school, I can maybe see doing it. I'd try to stay on-grade first, however.

My brother repeated a grade when transferring to private. He had an early August bday. He thinks it was the best thing for him..he was small and just hated being the youngest and felt out of place. He had zero academic issues so this switch was for social reasons. Fast forward years later..he is a successful and happy guy. Keep in mind it was rare to do this 30 years ago..now this is more common. The push back you may get and you can gauge if you care are from parents who have kids with summer birthdays who didn't hold back.

When we transferred from public school my son was one of the youngest kids in his class. For academic reasons I considered keeping him back. The decision to let him move forward hinged on his size. He was larger than most boys and the school during the admission process suggested to keep him in his grade. Note: Another private school accepted him but required that he repeat the grade due to academics.

His friend applying to the same school coming from another public school was accepted for the same grade level. He was much smaller than my son. His parents decided to send him to a charter school. They were worried about self esteem issues.

I don't feel repeating a grade would have been useful. The new school was an academic transition but he managed the first year and did not have any problems the subsequent years.

Unless there are academic issues, I would not repeat at this age. Kids mature at different times so let him just learn to manage. Our son is a Dec bday and still lagged behind maturity-wise compared to kids with summer birthdays many months after him. I'd think repeating academics at this age would lead to worse self esteem issues as well as boredom in the classroom. Plus, it's not like at K when they don't 'know' what's going on.

FWIW - our child's private school class has just a few kids that were not born in the appropriate Sept-Aug range for that grade. And a couple of them are girls.

We have been considering it for social reasons -- he looks younger than his classmates and just seems a bit less sophisticated (for example, still believing in Santa Claus while everyone else has moved on, etc.). He is doing well academically, which is why we are on the fence about this question. We wouldn't have him repeat if he were remaining at the same school, since he probably would feel "left behind," but thought that this may not be the case if he were to move to a new environment.

Why would you do that?

I realize that the redshirting topic has been heavily addressed on these boards, but I'm hoping that my question is a bit more specific. My child, a Fourth Grader, is enrolled in an area private school. He has a late July birthday, and we followed the school's advice to keep him with his current grade even though a fair number of the children are 9-14 months older. He is doing well academically, but does seem less "teenagers-ish" than his peers and is lacking a bit in self-confidence. We are hoping to transfer him to a different private school this year and were wondering if this might be a good time to readjust his grade level back a year. I've been told that it is most common to hold back summer-birthday children in the area privates and that he would most likely be significantly younger than his classmates in the new school. Has anyone been in a similar situation?