Are you saying your wife only deposits 75% of her take home income into the family account? I think I could be okay with keeping 5% in a side account but 25%? We don't have that much disposable income and it sounds like you don't either.

If she does have her own side account, she should be paying for her online courses with that money. What else is it going towards?

4k a month sounds like it includes all expenses not just child care. other than that - I am confused too

Anonymous wrote:Do live in the DC metro area? You had 50K income until recently, 48K in annual child care expenses but you also just dropped 100K on a house and can presumably afford a mortgage

I didn't understand the numbers either.

OP, if your wife is putting some of her money in her account "just in case," then go ahead and do the same. This sounds more like a relationship issue than a money issue.

Do live in the DC metro area? You had 50K income until recently, 48K in annual child care expenses but you also just dropped 100K on a house and can presumably afford a mortgage

what does she do with the rest of the money?

My income is in the low 50s and my wife just start working and she makes 30k. We recently purchased a house and I put down 100k and now our monthly expense is around 4k including child care. (So, basically we are pay check to pay check) I don't blame her making less than me, but the problem is that she feels ok to refuse to bring home all the money that she got paid, instead, i would say only about 75%. (that only covers barely 1/3 of our expense)

She is still taking online courses, which I am paying for the tuition. My original plan was to work OT, save up college fund for the kid and pay off the house, but it just give me the feeling that I am the only one doing it.

I know that you can really look at money this way when comes to marriage, and we all know that there are bills we have to pay, but if she is acting this way, why the hell am I even trying to work OT.....etc.

Sorry for the long post, just want to vent.