I concur with the above posters that said this is hard for a lot of kids. Especially shy nervous little Kindergartners. We had a lot of parents at first going in for lunch time with their kids just to get them acclimated. And let me tell you I have been in there and it is loud and is a bit crazy, but our school the staff is constantly reminding the kids to eat, helping to open juice boxes and bags -- they are all distracted, trust me, and the peanut-free table is the biggest (ha).

It will be okay, Mom. Why don't you go on the tour and see the K class at lunchtime so you can gauge what is happening and get your child ready maybe so at least it's not a total shock or surprise??

If he has an IEP, request the accomodations be written into it. You can also reach out to the principal of the school now as well as the special educator. Get them invested and on the same page with you. Bring your child so they can see what they are investing in.

Our school did this all informally and since my child at the time had a 1:1 aide, it wasn't much of an issue, but my view with more experience is that you get it in writing and you get the people that will enforce educated and invested early.

Ask about an allergies table.

The crowded lunchroom was a nightmare for DS. Even had an aide using a bullhorn to "quiet" the kids. Yikes! DS was frozen and rarely ate. We had no lunchtime accommodations. In hindsight...I would have pushed for.

Thank you everyone for your help! I think sitting on the edge might be an idea. I wonder if he would wear ear phones. I will just have to see what they have to say at the meeting. They are short on space but as a PP said, they have to have had a kiddo like my kiddo before.

Special Ed teacher here: have it written into the IEP or 504 plan that there are lunch time accommodations. Either in the cafeteria or an alternate location. We provide many accommodations, mostly for behaviors or social skills, that are not written into the IEP, but not everyone will do this. It would be nice if there is the option to invite a few friends so he is not eating by himself or just with a teacher. Lunch is an important social time. Good luck!

In our school, the K students eat first, so the noise level isn't as bad then.

Please know a lot of kids are like this andI have no doubt your school has this before. We knew this was going to be an issue for our youngest and spoke with his teachers (yes, he has an IEP but this isn't one of his accomodations). They gave him a set of headphones to wear during lunch. That made the noise level tolerable and he didn't get overstimulated or freak out. There are aides in the cafeteria helping kids make choices and to help them with their lunch money/number. There are also aides roaming around helping kids with straws, opening milk, getting a forgotten spoon, keeping the peace, etc. In K, the kids are given a snack. Past K, we've had written into the IEPs that our kids are allowed a mid-morning or a mid-afternoon snack as well (which we pack). This has worked out well for us. HTH.

I would alert the IEP team, but at least have him try the lunch room for 2 weeks. Make sure to give him a very high protein and nutrient dense breakfast and snack in case he doesn't eat lunch.

Mine had trouble at first in the lunchroom due to sensory issues. He got over it within a week or 2 and he eats everything I give him. There are always sweet nurturing girls (or boys) who will try to help out and this seemed to help my aspie.

Could he sit at the peanut free table maybe? He would not be able to bring peanut butter obviously, but there are a lot fewer kids at that table.

My Aspie sat on the edge of the row for the years he could handle lunch and then eventually he stopped being able to even handle that. Now he eats in a special ed room alone with an aide. We encourage him to try again in the cafeteria, but he won't do it. He's too scared that he'll get overwhelmed. So this arrangement is in his IEP.

What is the issue with the child? Does he have an IEP?

If your child needs accommodations in order to eat, you can and should receive them. I know my daughter gets them because of mobility issues. They include someone to help her gather her food in the cafeteria, to help her cut up her food when needed and to ensure that she has eaten and had Pediasure when necessary if the food is not a texture she can eat. One of her classroom aides does this.

My experience in my daughter's classroom is that there are several children like your DS who need to be reminded to focus and eat and who react poorly to a loud environment. The aides help to focus them and encourage them to eat. They also have done better over time.

I am wondering if anyone has received accomodations for their child for lunch time. My dc is going to Kindergarten next year. He shuts off when he is sitting in a large group of loud children and does not eat. I am at a loss as he has too eat, but they do not have a room to use for him. I was thinking maybe he could receive services during that time at least a a couple of days a week. His diagnosis, btw. is Aspergers.