Anonymous wrote:I think it's absolutely disgusting and you are right to try to get him to realize that this is a bad habit. I'd say to him what I say to my DH when he talks with his mouthful or leans his forearm on the table while he eats, "Do you eat this way when you are out dining with colleagues? Is this the impression you want to give with fellow business people?" If he says, "Well, I don't do it THENNNNN. . ." Then I say, "Good, then don't do it here either."

Thanks, mom!

OP, if I were him, I would tell you that I will stop doing this since it is so annoying to you...IF you will stop doing one thing of my choice that annoys me.

I think it's absolutely disgusting and you are right to try to get him to realize that this is a bad habit. I'd say to him what I say to my DH when he talks with his mouthful or leans his forearm on the table while he eats, "Do you eat this way when you are out dining with colleagues? Is this the impression you want to give with fellow business people?" If he says, "Well, I don't do it THENNNNN. . ." Then I say, "Good, then don't do it here either."

Anonymous wrote:Picking at harmless things like that will destroy your marriage.

These things turn my stomach to the point that I need to leave the room. We rarely go out to eat due to these poor eating habits.

Hardly harmless.

Anonymous wrote:When eating my DH licks his fingers or wipes them on his pants instead of using a napkin. He thinks that I am being ridiculous to criticize, and thinks it is no big deal. I find this behavior disgusting. Would you please weigh in? Thank you!

What do you plan to do, tell a bunch of anonymous strangers on DCUM agree with you? That'll show/shame him!

I find it disgusting as well, but if you did not notice while date dating i think you are just going have to live with it - or leave him. These are the types of habits that never go away.

Anonymous wrote:When eating my DH licks his fingers or wipes them on his pants instead of using a napkin. He thinks that I am being ridiculous to criticize, and thinks it is no big deal. I find this behavior disgusting. Would you please weigh in? Thank you!

Does he also rub his crotch or ass and sniff his fingers?

That's disgusting.

It might seem like a good idea to not nitpick for risk of "destroying the marriage", but what about you? Why should you have to watch him eat like a monkey? Won't that have an effect on your perceptions of him? If I were attracted to a man on the basis of appearance and intelligence and humor, and then sat down to a meal where he ate like he'd been raised in a boarding house, I'm not sure the attraction would survive. Bad table manners are up there on the turn-off list with nose-picking and body odor.

Also, won't somebody please think of the children? Do you want your kids to grow up doing that??

Mine uses bread, even if it's not served, to sop up all plate juices and remnats. Looks so gross. But you have to pick your fights.

I can't stand this sort of thing; it makes me almost vomit to see it.

As long as he washes his pants himself...

It's annoying, and not something you want your children to learn, but if he's still doing it at his age there's probably not much you can do.

My DH eats with something in both hands. A fork in one, a glass in the other. Or a fork in one, and holding the roll in the other. Whatever. I don't say anything. I would hate if he commented relentlessly on something about me.

My DH does both of those things, too. I think it's gross, but I'm no saint and don't say anything about it.

Picking at harmless things like that will destroy your marriage.

When eating my DH licks his fingers or wipes them on his pants instead of using a napkin. He thinks that I am being ridiculous to criticize, and thinks it is no big deal. I find this behavior disgusting. Would you please weigh in? Thank you!