Put down the food. Find your son. Ask for help loudly. Leave immediately if you can safely. If not, call 911

Get to a safe place. Do not worry about the bagels or coffee!!!

So you didn't say anything while at the store.

You had your DH call for you when you came home.

And now you are posting on an anonymous message board.

I suggest assertiveness training. If it were me, and I felt unsafe, I would have asked a cashier or employee if they would walk me to my car. You need to grow a spine!

OP, I'm sorry you had a bad experience. But ultimately you are responsible for your own safety. You are way too passive. Men are not going to ride to your rescue. There may not be men available to do so in every circumstance either. You need to practice speaking in a good firm voice and saying "LEAVE ME ALONE"..."GET AWAY FROM MY CHILD"..."BACK OFF NOW." And other assertive, positive statements.

It is up to you to protect your child in all situations. Teenage employees who may or may not speak English are not going to do it for you. And why should they, really? Why should they put their lives on the line for you?

Why didn't you just call the police?

As a mother it is now up to you to keep your child safe, not the men behind the deli at The Parkway.

I am sure you were shocked it was happening and they were probably too. But at the end of the day you have more to lose so take control of the situation-- though I hope it never happens again.

I'm 10000% sure everyone in there new I didn't know the guy which was confirmed when my husband called today.

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry.

Did you tell them you felt unsafe and ask them to help you?

OP, next time tell someone when this is happening. How were they to know you didn't know this guy?

Years ago I lived in the condos by parkway deli and there was a large, very mentally retarded AA man who frequented the deli and co-op and hung out outside ALL DAY. Perhaps this is the same person and if so the employees are used to him and didn't see the situation as threatening as he isn't dangerous.

That said - they should know that he freaks people out and at least offer you some verbal support.

Sorry that happened to you. Maybe call the non-emergency police line to report someone behaving that way next time. Be careful out there.

Yes when I got home and told my husband about this he was obviously outraged. He called to speak with the owner today. Apparently the owners brother was one of the men present. He got on the phone to talk to my husband and told him he had been thinking about it since it happened and that he should've called the police, especially when the man approached my child. He also said he had been watching me get into my car through the window but of course I had no idea. I didn't ask for help, not sure why. I think I felt like no one was going to help anyway and I honestly just wanted to get ds in the car.

I would have spoken to the manager.

Why didn't you speak up? It sounds like no one knew how to handle it so no one said anything. Once he had left, you could have said that it made you nervous and ask for the support you needed (someone to walk to the parking lot with you).

Your choice to not say anything at any time. The employees are pretty much damned if they do, damned if they don't. They can't read your mind.

I'm sorry that happened. I would encourage you to go back and speak with the manager about what happened. That is not okay, and the folks there need to know that this happened.

Wow that sounds scary. I'm glad you and your son are okay.

I'm sorry.

Did you tell them you felt unsafe and ask them to help you?

Wanted to share this experience:

This weekend I went to pick up breakfast at the parkway deli with my ds. I was the only patron there. There were about 4-5 employees behind the counters- all men. While asking if my food was ready at the counter I was approached by a large man (from behind) who was clearly high/intoxicated/both who asked me to buy him a smoothie. This man was inches from my face and much larger then me. I couldn't see my child and when I refused he continued to harass me, demanding I swipe my card. I tried to locate my son but couldn't see over this man and none of the employees said anything. The man then proceeded to Stare me down. And again, no one said anything. He left then and I half expected some sort of reaction from employee but nothing.

I went to bag up some bagels and the man returned. This time he approached my son (3 years old). At this point I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to be overly confrontational and start something where my son would be in the middle. He touched my sons head. I grabbed my son and went to pay. Again the man stared at me and no one in the store said a word. He left again and an employee handed me two
large bags. I had coffee in hand and a toddler I was holding. I was worried the man would be in the parking lot and again, it would be empty besides us. I was surprised when no one offered to walk me out or help me with bags.

As a mother I want to pass this on. These situations come up but to not say a word in defense, to apologize, or acknowledgment of an unsafe situation is disturbing.