Keep it as simple as you can so you, and hence your guests, will not be incredibly stressed out.

1) Buy a plastic turkey bag--speeds cooking and keeps it moist. Buy a turkey with the button that pops out when it's done.

2) Cook the stuffing seperately--better for food safety and you don't have to stuff the turkey.

3) Assuming that you are close friends with your guests and that they are normal people, it is reasonable to ask each couple to bring something especially because this is your first Thanksgiving and you have a toddler.

4) You don't have to make 10 dishes for 6 adults and 2 toddlers. Pick a few side dishes that you like, ideally ones you've made before. I can't make mashed potatoes to save my life, so I found an easy sweet potato casserole (bake the hell out of them and really soft and easy to get out of their skins) and skipped the mashed potatoes and gravy. We also had stuffing. Pre-made rolls that you pop in the oven are easy. Really, how many types of carbs do you need?

5) Try to schedule your mealtime around the toddlers' naps and designate someone to keep them entertained in a non-destructive way while you're finishing in the kitchen.

6) Go for simple decorations--whatever appeals to you and is short enough to see over.

Everyone has different traditions and favorite foods. The only advise I would offer is keep it simple. Cooking the turkey is the least of your concerns. If you follow the directions, it's really hard to screw up roasting a turkey. I make the same things every year.

Turkey
Cornbread Dressing (I am from the deep south...we don't do stuffing)
Gravy
Green Bean Casserole
Mashed potatoes
Sweet potato casserole
Spinach Madeline
Cranberry Sauce
Cranberry Salad
Yeast Rolls

Drink - Sweet Tea (of course)

For Desert
Pumpkin Walnut Pie
Sweet Potato Pie
Pecan Pie
Some kind of cake...usually a layered coconut.

Oh, forgot to mention, re: stuffing. Don't overstuff. Let the stuffing be somewhat loose inside, which still filling the cavity top to bottom. You will have to cook a separate dish to have enough to go around. One or two nervous nellies will eat the pan-cooked stuffing instead of the bird-stuffing (but they're silly, because that's why you have the thermometer). I guarantee, though, that you will not have a single scrap of the bird-stuffing left over! It's ALWAYS the first to go at my house.

Anonymous wrote:.... well, I'm not an experienced cook, I need to follow the recipe closely and look up words like 'brining' and it takes me double the time the recipe quotes. That kind of a cook.

I'm very excited that we will host Thanksgiving, we will be 6 adults and two young toddlers. Can you help with menu planning/pearls of wisdom, links to favorite/easy/no fail recipes?
Must have kitchen equipment, pantry items? (I might be missing something?) Ideas for decorations/setting the table? Time management? Entertainment advice?
How do I cook this meal and have time to spend with our guests, and with my toddler?

Any advice is welcome!!!

Please don't tell me to go to a restaurant, or buy everything premade/precooked. I really want to pull this off!

Do a trial run before the real one.

Canned cranberry, ew! You can make an AMAZING cranberry relish the day before, and you will never go back to the packaged stuff. Just take a bag of cranberries, wash and sort. Throw in the food processor with some OJ, some fresh orange zest, and one-half to one cup sugar. Add a little grated fresh ginger for fun. (You have to taste it til you get the sweetness right. Don't over do the sugar!!) Blend well. Stick in the fridge until needed, best overnight. No cooking.

Ditto stuffing. DON'T buy the bagged crouton stuff-- all you'll taste is the preservatives. Stuffing is so easy: sautee onions and celery and whatever else you like in olive oil. Mix with dry bread cut in to chunks. I like to add a cup of cooked wild rice; makes for an interesting texture, and keeps the bread from getting soggy/lumpy/sticky. Add herb mix of choice and moisten well with chicken or turkey broth (which you'll buy in a carton-- if there's any left over, throw it in the mashed potatoes). Definitely cook it IN the bird. If it wasn't cooked in the bird, why the hell bother??

Mashed potatoes: Do not over-mash. Lumps are good. Do add sour cream and butter.

Equipment: You can buy a tin turkey pan for $5. Do this, then throw it away. Get a cheap tater masher, too. You CAN do it with a sturdy spatula, but it's hard on the wrist. The one place where you'll want to spend some money is on the thermometer. I like the remote one, where the readout sits on the counter and the probe stays in the bird. It's a $30 item, but worth it. Watch a few youtube videos on how to place the probe, because there is nothing worse than pulling a "done" turkey out of the oven only to find that the probe was poking out the other side a giving a wildly inaccurate reading.

Fun! Wish I were cooking this year...

Thanksgiving is actually an easy meal to cook. Yes, you can gourmet it up, but you really don't have to.

Turkey -- really, all you need to do is buy a turkey, defrost it it, rub it with butter or olive oil, salt and pepper, and cook it according to the wrapper. It's a no-brainer.
Stuffing -- buy it pre-made. Don't put it in the turkey. Put it in a pan in the oven.
Mashed potatos or yams - boil or bake.
Salad
A vegetable of choice
Cranberry -- you can buy this.
Buy a pie
Extras like a bread or rolls, you can also buy.

Really, OP, it's not a difficult holiday if you break it down.

Make sure you have a roasting pan, and make sure it fits in your oven. Figure out the schedule to (a) make sure your bird is thawed by Thursday (it takes several days in the fridge if you buy it frozen), and (b) how many hours it's going to take to roast in the oven.

Don't try to make gravy. They sell good gravy at Whole Foods. That half hour between when the turkey comes out of the oven and when everybody sits down is filled with enough stress and traffic direction without having to figure out how to make gravy.

I seem to make a different turkey recipe every year but the most forgiving ones involve (a) roasting at 375 or 400 (lower, it's too easy to screw up the timing; higher, it's too easy to burn it or dry it out), and (b) massaging the bird gently under the skin with a mixture of soft butter, salt, pepper, and chopped sage & thyme (chopped fresh garlic optional). Google around, and use a recipe that involves these steps.

Take Weds. off, if possible, at least Weds. afternoon, and figure out what you can do in advance. If you make the pies in advance, for instance, that's a load off your mind and makes Thursday easier.

Sorry, dated reference above. Apps used to mean appetizers in my world!

Google the recipe for deconstructed turkey on epicurious. Very good, not tricky, and doesn't require sticking your hand inside the uncooked bird or carving.

Figure out what you want to or can easily make, and supplement with WF or Balduccis or Black Salt or Giant /Safeway premade sides. Here's one tip: the first year I paid $10 for a vat of cranberry sauce - and the realized that the recipe is cheap and idiot proof (boil cranberries with water and sugar till they pop, voila.)

ask guests if there is a favorite dish they want to bring. For some people "their" version of yams/beans/stuffing has special meaning - so you can make them happy and save some work, twofer.

Don't overdo it your first time, ESP if you are not a big cook routinely(which is the case for me as well).

Apps and wine are a key!

here's my no fail favorite:

peel and thick slice yams/sweet potatoes and apples
mix with 1/4 c brown sugar, 1/2 c orange juice, and 1/2 a stick of butter

layer in a 9x12 baking dish and bake for about an hour. then reheat while turkey sits.

I would suggest getting a Thanksgiving dinner from Whole Foods. You cook the turkey yourself. They provide a bunch of side dishes and a pie. What is does is take the pressure off to do everything on your own. The you can make your own sides and another dessert really well really well.

They give easy directions to cook the turkey.

Make ahead as much as possible! Have an oven schedule of what needs to be heated when (the turkey will need to sit after it comes out, so you can pop the other stuff in then). We don't host actual Thanksgiving but we do have a "Fakesgiving" party every year with our friends. This is our usual menu:

- Turkey (http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/good-eats-roast-turkey-recipe/index.html - this was the first time my husband had ever roasted a turkey and it was a huge success!) - husband makes day-of.

- Mashed potatoes - husband makes day-of.

- Stuffing (I love this stuffing SO MUCH: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/dan-smith-and-steve-mcdonagh/sausage-dried-cranberry-and-apple-stuffing-recipe/index.html) - husband makes day-of, but could be made in advance.

- Butternut squash apple cranberry bake (this is so easy and you can buy pre-chopped butternut squash at trader joe's: http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/butternut_squash_apple_cranberry_bake/) - I make this the day before.

- Cranberry chutney with apple and ginger (http://www.thebittenword.com/thebittenword/2011/11/thanksgiving-2011-cranberry-chutney-with-fennel-and-golden-raisins.html) - I make this a day or two before.

- Buy a pack of dinner rolls.

- I make a different dessert every year, but usually a pie or something else that can be made the day before. Or buy a pie, no one'll know.

We usually crowd-source from the guests to bring a vegetable side or dessert because everybody loves contributing to Thanksgiving. For appetizers we'll just put out some baguette slices and cheese.

I second Pioneer Woman for easy-to-follow recipes. I also am the type of cook who needs to follow recipes to the letter and none of the recipes I've linked to have ever failed me.

Have plenty of drinks, alcoholic and non. Our last party, we had a punch of apple cider, ginger ale, and Jack Daniels that was a HUGE hit.

I never cook, but I always make thanksgiving dinner and it comes out good (and believe me, if it sucked, I would say so). Stick w/ the basics, use easy recipes, and cook ahead. My husband usually smokes the turkey and my mother in law bring dessert. I get the majority of my receipes from Pioneer Woman's site. She has a lot of really easy T'giving things. My menu usually is - sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes w/ blue cheese ad walnuts, dressing, creamed spinach and cranberry sauce. I make most items on Wed night so I'm not dying of stress on Thurs. You can do it. I promise! Thaksgiving food is actually pretty easy.

Do you have someone who can help you - like someone who does know how to cook and has done Thanksgiving before? Because although I'm sure you can do it, it's a lot of pressure to pull off Thanksgiving dinner for the first time.

.... well, I'm not an experienced cook, I need to follow the recipe closely and look up words like 'brining' and it takes me double the time the recipe quotes. That kind of a cook.

I'm very excited that we will host Thanksgiving, we will be 6 adults and two young toddlers. Can you help with menu planning/pearls of wisdom, links to favorite/easy/no fail recipes?
Must have kitchen equipment, pantry items? (I might be missing something?) Ideas for decorations/setting the table? Time management? Entertainment advice?
How do I cook this meal and have time to spend with our guests, and with my toddler?

Any advice is welcome!!!

Please don't tell me to go to a restaurant, or buy everything premade/precooked. I really want to pull this off!