OP, if your DH is willing to do without a yard, is he also willing to be the one who takes the kids to the park every time they want to play outside? If you can't walk to Metro, is he willing to let you be the one with the car every time one of them is in the shop? If you buy a smaller house, is he willing to let you have a room as your office while he works at the dining room table?

In other words, is he willing to make the sacrifices, or is he pushing them onto you?

I agree with 9:26. Even at the lower end of the price range you are talking about, you can afford a decent house in a decent location. If your spouse doesn't feel comfortable spending more, I'd respect that, and perhaps squirrel away some of the savings for future improvement projects.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HHI over 1M, you don't need to be asking this question.

Exactly. My heart bleeds for the OP.

Wow. Not asking for sympathy. Just for conflict resolution and how to go about it. If it makes everyone happier, divide everything in half or in 1/4ths- still the same problem and still trying to ascertain comfort level. How about "We make about $250K per year, have a healthy savings of $200K, but are $150K apart on how much house we can afford" What can we really afford and how do we go about it? Is that more palatable?

I vote this topic line in for the "1st world problems" thread!

Anonymous wrote:HHI over 1M, you don't need to be asking this question.

Exactly. My heart bleeds for the OP.

HHI over 1M, you don't need to be asking this question.

No kids in private. Want to be within beltway near (walking?) to metro or bus. I think we could comfortably afford up to 1.7M, husband would like to be under 1M

Anonymous wrote:Agreed, but there are simply things I would like my kids to have the benefit of (yard), but DH does not see it as necessity.

Wait. You can get a house with a yard for $300K, if you're willing to compromise on neighborhood. And a house with a yard in Bethesda for $700-900K. I don't see how the yard is a deal-breaker on an alleged HHI of $1M, unless you have 6 kids in private school or something.

So what is the price range you're considering?

Anonymous wrote:Pyschology student lady?

?? No. FT employed mom.

Pyschology student lady?

Agreed, but there are simply things I would like my kids to have the benefit of (yard), but DH does not see it as necessity.

It doesn't matter how much you CAN afford. If one feels more comfortable spending less, that seems like the starting point.

I am far too white trash to have any kind of opinion on this issue so I will just congratulate you that this is the kind of problems you have.

HHI is a bit over 1M, healthy accessible savings of $750K, and we are about $500K apart with how much house we can afford. What is reasonable, and how do we resolve this?