Let them take one picture the way they want and then say, "Okay, make room for me in this picture. We want to have one with the whole family."

Anonymous wrote:PP: Does it bug you?

yeah

I let him have it one Thanksgiving WE HOSTED when MIL gathered the crew together for a picture.

But it didn't make a difference. So now - when my kids see the pictures w/o me - I won't be able to lie. And I'm certainly NOT pushing myself into the photos next year.

It's just such a weird dynamic. I am an only but I come from a HUGE extended family. So we have tons of pictures with everyone in them - cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, grandparents, in laws. So I don't get it.

It's passive-aggressive, I guess. And while I'm aggressive, it's not worth another fight. So I'll let the pictures speak for themselves once my kids are old enough to understand them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there no other in-laws because of divorce, or just lack of marriage?

OP here. Both. One has had 3 marriages, 2 have never married, and one is a widow.

I personally wouldn't do it that way, but given your husband's sibling's marital history I can understand why they might.

I am actually glad to hear of other weird IL families who pull stuff like this. I thought mine was the only one! Wackos!!

PP: Does it bug you?

Anonymous wrote:They do this ever time they are together. There are 5 of them, my husband is the youngest and I am the only in-law. They are so clueless. My daughter recently had her wedding and what do I get tagged with.....a picture of the 5 of them! I am so irritated!

Your husband just accepts it?

Mine does. He has never come to find me when the family pics are taken.

Anonymous wrote:They do this ever time they are together. There are 5 of them, my husband is the youngest and I am the only in-law. They are so clueless. My daughter recently had her wedding and what do I get tagged with.....a picture of the 5 of them! I am so irritated!

I am in the same boat.

Each time there's a gathering, I'm never asked to be in the picture. My BIL gets the same treatment.

I have lost interest in family pics at this point and figure that when my kids see the pics, it will register that Mom was missing.

Anonymous wrote:Are there no other in-laws because of divorce, or just lack of marriage?

OP here. Both. One has had 3 marriages, 2 have never married, and one is a widow.

My inlaws do this. At the beginning it was just another sign they were unwelcoming, but now I don't care. I would just have a fake smile on my face if I could muster that up. They are psycho. Part of the reason my in-laws do this is because their family is divorce city (2 in-laws are on their 3rd marriage) so they don't want to have to get rid of favorite photos because someone's ex is there. We are both on our first marriage and we plan to keep it that way.

Ugh, that's especially awful since you are the only in-law.

Both DH and my families do both sets of pics. Parents with only their children, and then parents with their children, childrens' spouses and grandchildren. As long as it's part of a larger group of pics, I'm fine with it.

Are there no other in-laws because of divorce, or just lack of marriage?

OP, mine are the same way. They are jack*sses. Maybe they are jealous of you?

I hate to say it, my DH does the same thing. Makes a HUGE negative passive aggressive to do about how horrible photos are, somehow. I have never seen anything like it, nor would I believe it myself unless I saw it first hand.

Some families are f*cked up. Sorry you are in the middle of it.

So, your husband is the only one of five children that has a spouse (you)?

What? This post doesn't make sense, like, AT ALL.

They do this ever time they are together. There are 5 of them, my husband is the youngest and I am the only in-law. They are so clueless. My daughter recently had her wedding and what do I get tagged with.....a picture of the 5 of them! I am so irritated!