Female here. Is it ok if I don't offer to split? Or should I?

My DH did this on our first date. And yes, it was a huge turn-off. Still, I liked everything else about him, so I gave him another chance. And he did it on the second date too. So finally I told him what a problem it was. He needed education . He still needs guidance on some things, esp to do with money (grew up poorer than most of his friends, always had to work for everything, so is very tight with money, whereas I grew up with plenty and am very generous). Aside from this, though, he is perfect for me, and since no one is actually "perfect," this is a "negative" that I can deal with, esp as he is open to being told that he needs to loosen up (his wallet).

Could be a sign he's not that into you.

PP if you have to analyze a first date that hard, it ain't romantic. I repeat, not a keeper.

Who asked for the date? How much was the dinner? How old are you and the guy? What do you and he do for a living? Where are you and he in your careers?

Did you go back and forth about splitting or did he agree as soon as you said it? I would give him a second chance. I'm a pretty big feminist, but I still would like the guy to offer to pay the bill on the first date (don't care if I do after some back and forth). I could see how it would be confusing for a guy who might be trying not to offend someone.

Not a keeper.

MASSIVE red flag. I wouldn't go out with him again.

Anonymous wrote:Pay your share and stop whining.

Date much? I'm guessing no.

Pay your share and stop whining.

He should pay unless it was your idea. Then you go dutch.

Yup. Next time, do not offer to split. If he asked you out, then he's paying.

Go with your gut-check. I say Nada, but maybe he just hasn't been trained right.

Turnoff.

I usually make the effort to pay on the first date and it is usually turned down. Went out with someone who let me split. Otherwise I liked him, but it was a turnoff. Is it a red flag?