Anonymous wrote:I said "horse doovers" for "hors d'oeuvres" until I was 25.

Lol!

Anonymous wrote:I once pooped out an entire string from a rotisserie chicken.
I did not know that I swallowed it!

Once I had to run panicked into the bathroom to aid my screaming kindergartner. He ate a fruit roll up of the first time and didn't know to remove the plastic backing. Yes, I had to pull it out for him. Gross and funny!

I said "horse doovers" for "hors d'oeuvres" until I was 25.

I once pooped out an entire string from a rotisserie chicken.
I did not know that I swallowed it!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, the same skirt thing happened to me during my lunch hour once. Thankfully a nice woman came up behind me and told me that my skirt was stuck in my pantyhose. I was mortified, because I had walked a little way in the mall at that point. God bless that woman.

Today I had to tell my boss his fly was down. Apparently he broke it. So I lent him a safety pin.

LOL omg that's good.

Anonymous wrote:OP, the same skirt thing happened to me during my lunch hour once. Thankfully a nice woman came up behind me and told me that my skirt was stuck in my pantyhose. I was mortified, because I had walked a little way in the mall at that point. God bless that woman.

Today I had to tell my boss his fly was down. Apparently he broke it. So I lent him a safety pin.

OP, the same skirt thing happened to me during my lunch hour once. Thankfully a nice woman came up behind me and told me that my skirt was stuck in my pantyhose. I was mortified, because I had walked a little way in the mall at that point. God bless that woman.

Anonymous wrote:This isn't mine, but one time I was at a Marshall's or a TJ Maxx (something of that ilk) with my mom and she was trying on a pair of white pants in the dressing room. I didn't know this at the time, but she sharted. She actually shit in the white pants... and wasn't wearing underwear, because she used to like to go commando. I just knew suddenly, she was hurrying me out of the store for no reason. Later that afternoon she confessed to me and I was so grossed out because not only did she just put them back on the rack while she was hustling out of there, but she wanted ME to go back in the next day and buy them for her!

There are so many things wrong with this I don't even know where to start...

Anonymous wrote:I just don't think those can be topped.

Hilarious

One time in college I took a nap with Oxy ten in little dots all over my face. Woke up, went down the hall, visited people, talked for a couple hours... got back to my room and realized I still had Oxy ten dots on my face. My good friend and roommate, when I asked, "Why didn't you tell me?" Responded, "I thought you were coming out of your shell".

I once shat myself on a long-distance bus in Turkey.

Wow, OMG! Wasn't your butt a little drafty? Did you not sit down until you got home?

OMG! LOL about the hiked up skirt!!! You did not notice strange looks from people!? You have a GREAT story now!!!!

This isn't mine, but one time I was at a Marshall's or a TJ Maxx (something of that ilk) with my mom and she was trying on a pair of white pants in the dressing room. I didn't know this at the time, but she sharted. She actually shit in the white pants... and wasn't wearing underwear, because she used to like to go commando. I just knew suddenly, she was hurrying me out of the store for no reason. Later that afternoon she confessed to me and I was so grossed out because not only did she just put them back on the rack while she was hustling out of there, but she wanted ME to go back in the next day and buy them for her!

I just don't think those can be topped.

I have two that come to mind. One that happened today and I am mortified. I always go to the bathroom before I leave work. I discovered, after walking out of a full elevator, to the metro, on the metro and to home, that my skirt was tucked into my hose. And, I don't wear underwear with hose so I was showing basically my entire ass to the good folks of DC. And, this was not a Jennifer Anniston butt. Please, if you ever see someone doing that, let them know. I only realized when I got home and my husband said, "your skirt is hiked up to your ass." and he has not stopped giggling since.

Second revelation and I think about this every summer. I am an only child and my mom is a very conservative Catholic and anything remotely related to sexuality was not discussed. Thanks God for Judy Blume books and girlfriends. I still can't believe how uninformed I was. So, it wasn't until my sophomore year in college that I discovered that you are supposed to wax or shave your bikini area. I was so clueless that I didn't even realize that hair sticking out of your bathing suit was something to be self-conscious about, much less get rid of. I owe a big debt of gratitude to my college roommate who told me "dude, you gotta do something about your pubes." and, then explained the facts of life as they pertain to grooming! I still think of the summers before this revelation and cringe!