If I had a penny for every phrase that set me off... Well, let's just say I wouldn't have to work to make ends meet. But then I remember a phrase my last boss taught me: Assume noble intent. As hard as it may be, I try to remember that most people are not evil. You can usually chalk it up to social awkwardness, a lack of being able to identify something more constructive/supportive to say, or an incomprehension of the severity of the issue. I can often be like this myself and I know that I don't mean to be hurtful when I say something stupid, so it's likely that others don't, either.

That's bizarre. Maybe she was just socially awkward and was trying to come up with the only bright side she could to a non-walking kid?

I'm a single mom with an ex who is a terrific, active co-parent (who has never been late with a generous child support payment.) I get a little tired of people asking "how's that going?" with that sympathetic expression. as in "has he disappeared on you yet, forcing you to hound him for child support?" lol. i'm sure they're just making conversation, but sometimes it strikes me as pitying, which is annoying.

I hate it when people say my toddler needs to go to preschool to socialize. That's not our lifestyle, get over it.

OP here...glad to know I'm not alone is associating with people who just like to shove 2 feet and possibly a hand in their mouth. Some of these are unreal (the stepmom of the autistic boy...that's truly unbelievable!).

My kids have significant speech delays/problems. Personally, I would rather deal with a movement disorder.

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid with a life threatening eating disorder. The phrase that sets me off is "all kids will eat when they are hungry".

Did they know your child had an eating disorder? If so...I would have punched them in the face.

(Signed, someone who watched her best friend suffer for years from an eating disoder)

My god, are people really saying these things????

I have a kid with a life threatening eating disorder. The phrase that sets me off is "all kids will eat when they are hungry".

For me it was when my DC was in the NICU after she was born prematurely. "You are so lucky to be able to catch up on sleep!"

"Just sleep when they sleep"

Really?

I hated it when parents told us to enjoy being parentless when we were busting our tail and spending every last red cent trying to get pg, and, later, trying to adopt. We didn't have any extra friggin' $$ to spend on enjoying ourselves bieng parentless (no vacations, etc.) because we were spending up the wazoo to try to become parents. We were, in effect, spendign as much, or more than, people with children, and had nothing to show for it.

I had a friend tell me once that my step-son's severe autism (profoundly low-functioning) was God's way of making sure he didn't end up to be something "evil" when he grew up, like a mass murderer or something. I guess she thought she could say this because he was "just" my step-son?

People are clueless. I'd like to think most of them still have a good heart. I just try to push forward and enjoy my time with my big kid.

I am sorry OP. Some people are such dolts.

Hang in there. Its hard when your kid isn't within the expected parameters and you are doing everything you can. Hugs.

What OP?! Who the hell says that to someone with an 18 mo old?!

I would feel exactly the same way and quite honestly, would likely tell folks that you don't need the reminder that you're little one isn't walking. As a matter of fact, you are WELL aware she is not walking and aware of the challenges you both will have going forward. While you never forget that she isn't walking, you do try to focus on the fact that she is a beautiful little girl with smiles for miles and this is your little girl and nobody elses. But hey asshole, thanks for bringing me out of my stupor and reminding me of every single thing that I can't get out of my head. Ever.

My son, well he's nonstop. He's honestly a 4yo boy and is quite capable of concentrating when he wants to or it's an activity that he really enjoys. But just because my kid doesn't stop dead in his tracks to read a book at the library doesn't mean he is ADD or ADHD. So stop diagnosing my child and see that he is a physical child that loves to have fun. After all, he is FOUR.

This rainy day is making me a bit down, and I had a chat with another woman this morning who said what is quickly becoming the #1 phrase that makes me want to destroy something:

"You should enjoy the fact that DD isn't walking yet, because it's the best kind of delay!".

No, it really isn't. DD is 18.5 mo, and still unable to pull herself up to a stand, or to sit down successfully (w/o help) from a standing position. She doesn't roll. She has orthotics on her feet, and will have them indefinitely, and when she does start walking, we will need to spend at least $1k on custom orthotics. She does not cruise, and she does not show any interest, really, in exploring the house when she crawls. Most of the time she sits in one place, and doesn't really want to move around at all. I realize, really I do, that when people say that, they are trying to help me look on the "bright side", but I would honestly give ANYTHING right now to be able to chase my little girl around the playground, house, neighborhood, etc. A simple "I'm sorry, that sounds really hard" would be so much better as something to say .

Anyone else have a rage-inducing catch phrase?