Bring the neighbor a bottle of wine.

OP, I sleep trained at 5 months. Was not too early for my son.

I can't believe so many people think it's OK to subject the neighbor to this. If someone wok me up for extended periods in the middle of the night with something in their control, I would go ballistic. It's one thing if the kid is sick and you are trying to comfort him, it's quite another to intentionally let him cry. And btw, the neighbor asking if the baby is OK is her polite way of telling you that your baby woke her up. Don't put her in the uncomfortable position of having to be more direct.

Does your neighbor have a two bedroom apt? Let he know you are sleep training and that she might want to switch rooms for a few nights. Or find out when she's going out of town.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get why placing the 5mo in the tot's room would disturb your neighbor...

OP here - it wouldn't - just a poorly written opening statement. Doing any sort of sleep training that would require a few minutes of crying in our current set up would disturb our neighborn because our 5 month old is in our room (shared wall with the neighbor). She already has told us "Is XX okay, I heard crying at 1am last night" when XX woke up for a snack.

Thanks for the help everyone. What non-CIO methods might you recommend?

So what? I wouldn't read so much into this comment. If your neighbor is bothered by the crying, let her actually say, "Could you please keep the baby's crying to a minimum?," instead of interpreting "Is XX okay, I heard crying at 1am last night," as such.

Also, your neighbor should be able to handle one week of real CIO, if that is what you choose. Be forewarned that some babies cry for an hour or more the first few nights of CIO. Don't pussyfoot and do only 10 minutes of CIO -- either do it or don't.

I also agree with PPs that 5 months is too early for CIO - and I am not against CIO, either - for two reasons: 1) 5 months may be too early developmentally for CIO sleep training, and 2) you will most likely have to repeat CIO if you do it this early -- CIO is an ongoing training method. You may find that it needs repeating after disturbances to routine, such as travelling or growth spurts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't bother. Five months is still too early. Wait until the baby is a little older. For now, hold/cuddle/snuggle them - it is the least stressful option.

I am not anti-CIO; I just think that (a) 5 months is a few months too early and (b), it is going to end up being more stress overall then just continuing to get up.

In the meantime, work on those good sleep habits.

+1

+2 Maybe you can try other methods besides CIO when your baby's a few months older so you won't have to disturb your toddler.

Kids crying (and whatever other noises neighbors make) is part of apartment living. Your neighbor needs to get over herself. It's a few minutes of crying......sure as heck is better than marathon sex sessions my neighbor has with an incredibly squeaky bed and Screaming Girl at 3am!

Anonymous wrote:I don't get why placing the 5mo in the tot's room would disturb your neighbor...

OP here - it wouldn't - just a poorly written opening statement. Doing any sort of sleep training that would require a few minutes of crying in our current set up would disturb our neighborn because our 5 month old is in our room (shared wall with the neighbor). She already has told us "Is XX okay, I heard crying at 1am last night" when XX woke up for a snack.

Thanks for the help everyone. What non-CIO methods might you recommend?

You may be surprised what your 3 year old can sleep through. My kids have been amazingly good at sleeping through the noise of their siblings.

Anonymous wrote:Just don't bother. Five months is still too early. Wait until the baby is a little older. For now, hold/cuddle/snuggle them - it is the least stressful option.

I am not anti-CIO; I just think that (a) 5 months is a few months too early and (b), it is going to end up being more stress overall then just continuing to get up.

In the meantime, work on those good sleep habits.

+1

Just don't bother. Five months is still too early. Wait until the baby is a little older. For now, hold/cuddle/snuggle them - it is the least stressful option.

I am not anti-CIO; I just think that (a) 5 months is a few months too early and (b), it is going to end up being more stress overall then just continuing to get up.

In the meantime, work on those good sleep habits.

I second the advice to do some room switching...toddler in your room for a few days and baby in the toddler's room. However, five months is a bit early to CIO if that is your plan for sleep training (just my opinion of course). You may have better success if you wait a bit longer and are sure that the baby is ready. I am a firm believer that a baby who is ready to sleep train will not cry for long periods of time. Again, I know there are conflicting ideas on the topic but this is what has worked for us and people I know. We did Ferber at eight months and there was very little crying.

I don't get why placing the 5mo in the tot's room would disturb your neighbor...

I didn't want to do CIO, so I'm not BTDT, but can you put the toddler in your room for the duration and the baby in the kids' room? Other option is to go ask the neighbor if she/he minds a few nights of possible crying baby. Let neighbors know the perameters: you'll let baby cry max 15 minutes, or whatever. Bring wine.

CIO isn't the only method of sleep training, OP. Try another method.

We live in a 2-bedroom condo. The master bedroom shares one wall with our neighbors and one wall with our 3-year-old toddler's bedroom. We have a 5-month-old sleeping in a pack n play in our room. We'd like to do some sleep training with the infant so that we can move him out of our room and into the "kids' bedroom." But we can't let him cry in the middle of the night because our neighbor has already told us she can occassionally hear him. One thought is to ask friends to take our toddler for two nights and put the infant in her room.

any BTDT parents with small apartments, unhappy neighbors, and a fairly strong desire to move the infant out of your bedroom? Could you please tell us some scenarios that might work and while sleep training methods you used? Our toddler didn't require any sleep training. She was just amazing, so we're new to this.

Thank you so much for your help.