OP, you're nice to be so considerate, unlike most people. I don't think you're being rude here. Has the person in the car ever glared at you or given you reason to suspect that he/she was annoyed?

This is kind of a strange question. You're 36 yo and wondering about this now?

As long as no one is sitting/leaning/resting their grocery bags on top of me, I don't give a damn who boards first.

Depends, has person A peeled back the corn to see if it's good? Was there a hurricane or earthquake happening? These things matter!

OP, you are too afraid of giving offense to strangers. Really.

You guys should do like in our culdesac:

Drop your backpacks, suitcases, laptopbags or breast pump bags in line as soon as you step at the bus stop to "hold your spot" in line and go play. When the bus approaches you then run as fast as you can and jump in line where your stuff is sitting

OP, it's very nice of you to be so kind, but I really don't think you need to worry about this. You're acting just fine.

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused as to why this is even an issue. Is there a reason why someone would need to be first to board a bus as opposed to second? I take the bus every single day of my life, seriously, and it has never ocurred to me to even consider my spot in boarding the bus in relation to when I got to the stop and where I am standing. Maybe I'm missing something?

OP here. No reason why someone needs to be first or second. As explained above, I stand at the bus stop and board when it arrives. I've deferred to the car woman before but generally do not. But then I started getting paranoid that I was being rude by not letting her board first, a sort of jump-the-queue move, if you will. Other people on our bus line stand in an orderly queue and get on in the order in which they are lined up waiting. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't snubbing etiquette.

No issue. The line forms at the bus door.

Don't get me started on bus riding etiquette, thou!!!

I agree that this doesn't matter. But, since you asked, here's the way I would view it. Person A isn't at the bus stop until he gets out of the comfort of the car and stands outside like the rest of you. Therefore, unless he was out of the car before you got there, he isn't first at the bus stop.

I'm confused as to why this is even an issue. Is there a reason why someone would need to be first to board a bus as opposed to second? I take the bus every single day of my life, seriously, and it has never ocurred to me to even consider my spot in boarding the bus in relation to when I got to the stop and where I am standing. Maybe I'm missing something?

Anonymous wrote:Let me get this straight. Person B (and Persons C-Z) is supposed to know that Person A -- in the car -- is waiting for the bus, and defer to this person? Are you serious?

If you are waiting for a bus, you are at a bus stop. If you are sitting in a car, you are sitting in a car, on your tush. You are not waiting for a bus.

And I agree with the PP. How important is it to you to be "the very first person on the bus." Are you four years old?

OP here, and while it may be surprising to you, I'm not 4. I'm 36. And I'm person B and want to make sure that I'm not offending A by boarding when the bus comes first. I have no issues with not being "the very first person on the bus" but I don't want to seem rude. And this is a small bus stop in the suburbs and the same people are there every single day, so yes, it's obvious that A is waiting for the bus in a car, as she does every.single.day at 5.45am in a suburban neighborhood.

Let me get this straight. Person B (and Persons C-Z) is supposed to know that Person A -- in the car -- is waiting for the bus, and defer to this person? Are you serious?

If you are waiting for a bus, you are at a bus stop. If you are sitting in a car, you are sitting in a car, on your tush. You are not waiting for a bus.

And I agree with the PP. How important is it to you to be "the very first person on the bus." Are you four years old?

Whoever is closest to where the bus physically stops. You're still getting to the destination at the same time. Really, who cares?

Person A is first at the stop and waits in a car with their spouse and when the bus pulls up, they get out. Person B and so on arrive after A is there, but they stand at the stop. Who should board first? Does etiquette dictate that A should get on first b/c they were technically there first or should B, C, etc. go first b/c they're actually standing at the stop?