This is pretty much what we did, although my kid's special needs weren't sensory and didn't impact his ability to sit. I would note as a preschool teacher, that many kids who struggle to sit still for circle time, can manage a meal time because the activity of eating is pretty engaging. Similarly, many of those kids can sit relatively still for 5 or 10 minutes while playing with a particularly engaging toy.

As to whether or not it's cruel, I think it depends on how you do it. If you suddenly whip away your kid's lunch, saying "No food for you, you got up!" and then make them starve until dinner? Yep, that's cruel.

If you invite your toddler to the table, and serve a particularly yummy snack, and when they get up say "Oh, you're done, let's go play", and then offer another snack (or the same snack, not sure why it needs to go in the trash) an hour later, the kid will learn that getting down is a signal that they're done. Once the kid gets the connection, you can start doing something similar with meals.

I don't know your kid, so I can't judge whether they'd be ready, but I do think that many 2's can learn to sit until they're done eating.

Anonymous wrote:Floor time...you sit on floor with kid and you narrate his play. Don't direct it...just narrate. Oh your putting the red block on top of the blue book. Now you are building a house...he should pick up some language that way. Really helped my little guy.

That's a great technique, but it's not floortime.

Floortime is when you join a child's play, create challenges, encourage elaboration and problem solving, respond to a kid's communication. . . .

Floor time...you sit on floor with kid and you narrate his play. Don't direct it...just narrate. Oh your putting the red block on top of the blue book. Now you are building a house...he should pick up some language that way. Really helped my little guy.

Anonymous wrote:

While sitting calmly in situations like circle time would be a nice change for DS, that isn't our main goal for our interventions at this time (and wasn't the main concern we voiced to the Dr, I think Dr was just annoyed that our son wouldn't sit through all the coginitive tests). As some of you mentioned - he is only two. Our main goal is to work on increased communication skills and helping DS to better regulate himself so he can play with his toys rather than spin in circles and walk around aimlessly.

This sounds like a totally different issue, and it sounds like the doctor wasnt listening to you and didnt have appropriate expectations. I'd find someone else.

OP here,

Thank you all for your feedback. I knew this wasn't a good idea, and you all helped me realized that my gut reaction on this was right.

While sitting calmly in situations like circle time would be a nice change for DS, that isn't our main goal for our interventions at this time (and wasn't the main concern we voiced to the Dr, I think Dr was just annoyed that our son wouldn't sit through all the coginitive tests). As some of you mentioned - he is only two. Our main goal is to work on increased communication skills and helping DS to better regulate himself so he can play with his toys rather than spin in circles and walk around aimlessly.

And thank you for your suggestions on waiting strategies and sitting strategies, as DS progresses we will try these out!

My nt son and his friends can't sit still for more than a moment. We do a structured playgroup with about 15 other kids his age, and circle time is all about movement and distraction. I don't want to minumize any special needs, but are you sure your expectations are age appropriate?

Hi check out http://www.therapyshoppe.com/therapy/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=3&products_id=1781&sort=20a&page=1 for ideas for seating pad.

please do not do this. Mealtimes are meant to be social, pleasant family events. that is what children need to learn to be successful in the real world about meals. If you introduce fear that their food will be taken away (a disproportionate response) you could really damage your relationship with your child. if you currently have a child with a limited diet, this could really cause problems. if you want your child to sit still - there are other means.

one common approach to helping build patience - sitting still - is to pick a simple low value reward - a marshmellow, playing with a cherished toy..... - and telling your child they can have it if they sit still for 2 seconds. (i am not kidding - you start with sucess). you try that exercise frequenly - moving up from 2 seconds to 4 seconds to ....... Every success builds in the child the concept that they can sit still. and milimeter by milimeter you build success. eventually they are sitting still for 5 minutes. but keep the reward low value. And if they fail, just put the reward away and say you will try again the next day. no yelling or judgment. just be calm and say you can try again the next day or later in that same day and get up and walk away.

Is the stability pad like the ones you can get at a fitness store for ab work? We were thinking of trying that out for circle time.

My child with similar problems could not do any type of circle time until he was about 3. Even then it was hard. We had the school use a special carpet square for him to sit on and that seemed to work ok. He is older and uses a stability pad (looks like a circle) now.

Yes, even for an NT 2 year old that seems asking too much for both sitting and eating.

Agree with the pp that there have got to be other ways to accomplish this. Two years old is really young to sit still, even for typical kids! Has the doc suggested anything else, like different kinds of seating at circle time? there are various cushions etc that provide different kinds of input (forgive me if I'm telling you something you already know).

Also, do you want him to be motivated by/rewarded with food? It's not uncommon (unfortunately) in the special needs world, but it's really hard to transition from. (and of course it's generally problematic for all of the reasons you don't reward typical kids with food, either.)

OP here, thank you for your opinion.

We aren't having issues at meal time (besides from a limited diet); he does just fine sitting through entire meals at home and in restaurants in a restaurant style high chair.

I was told this would help him teach himself how to sit for longer periods of time in general, which is why I questioned it and wanted to see if this has worked for others.

Honestly that sounds pretty wacky to me. I have a older kid with similar issues and I'd never do that. And your little guy is only 2.

What troubles you about mealtime now? Is this to solve a problem or to just practice sitting still? I have read a ton of books on Sensory as I've gone through that journey with my son and never heard any suggestions like that. If you are trying to improve regulation I think there are alot better ways. Just my honest reaction from a fellow mom.

My two year old DS is still in the early phases of getting evaluated and starting with different therapies. He has language delays, sensory issues (sensory seeker), and possibly ASD. One of the doctors we are seeing recommended that we move him from his high chair to a booster seat that he is able to climb out of for his meals. Then we are supposed to serve him his meal and if he gets out of the seat, we throw it away regardless of how much he has eaten. From this he is supposed to learn to regulate himself to get through a meal, because 'children don't let themselves starve'. DS is an exceptionally picky eater, but we've never had issues with the quantity he is eating.

Part of me is afraid that this could bring on a whole new problem and I think the method is saying that he's just never been motivated enough to sit in circle time, doing small motor tasks, etc and that if the motivation is great enough he will figure it out just seems a little strange.

My question is, since I'm assuming this isn't a completely novel idea the Dr came up with, has anyone done this and seen it work for their DC?

I'm supposed to see this doctor in 2 weeks, and have tried this before then. I will better trying this out if its actually worked for anyone.

TIA.